Saturday, February 20, 2010

Military Fetishism

Gary Graham falls for a con-man's story. To his credit, he's retracted it, but look at how the interview starts:
Gary Graham – Scott, tell me about your background and how it lead to your group, Dark Horse.

Scott Witt – Well, to tell you of my background is to tell you what Dark Horse is. Dark Horse was a call sign – it was my personal call sign, back in the day of my special forces [work].

GG – When was that, when did you serve?

SW – Everything I did in special forces was ‘black ops’. I first joined the Rangers back in 1987 and I was only with the Rangers for a year when I decided to join what was called ‘the Cherokee’ at that time. They were a mixture of special forces. It was not just Rangers, it was Navy SEALs, it was Marines, it was everyone. And they’d take the best of the best…and create one unit. And that unit answered only to the Pentagon. And from that point forward, all we did was black ops. Nothing we ever did could be talked about from that point forward.

GG – Okay.

SW – So, anyway, the members of these types of groups…as we all kinda got shot up, and retired, and came home…and a lot of us now are heads of corporations…and serve as vice presidents of major banks…things like that all over the country. But we wanted to kinda stay together as a group and we wanted to make sure we always did something for the good. We got in to doing personal protection, as a group. And I formed Dark Horse Tactical. We did several things – for example, police officers, they get very little training when they come out of the academy. Even SWAT officers have training that’s very minimal, compared to what they could get. And the only reason teir training is so minimal is because the cities or the counties they work for won’t pay for [the advanced training].
Yes, a lot of heads of corporations and bankers who have previously been in "The Cherokee" - a super-special mix of forces nobody ever heard of - want to train the officers of the Tuscaloosa police force in their spare time.

DID THE CORRECTION ALPACA HEAR OF THIS?

Also:

21 comments:

mikey said...

Hee hee.

Sad little wannabe.

Let's just say that the people he WANTS to hang out with wouldn't be seen within, oh, ten klicks of him...

Substance McGravitas said...

The commenters in the article got the ball rolling, so here's to those rare right-wing maniacs who can smell bullshit.

J— said...

I decided to join what was called ‘the Cherokee’

Cherokee people, Cherokee tribe!

J— said...

Graham in the update (my emphasis):

I have recently become aware of The Stolen Valor Act, and of the pathetic presence of many ‘false heroes’, poseurs and impostors out there[.]

Dude, welcome to the blogosphere.

mikey said...

These idiots crack me up. Nobody was a grunt. Everybody was jason fucking bourne.

It's like with past lives. You never hear about somebody who was a serf. Nobody cleaned up the horse shit, or died of smallpox at fifteen. They were all royalty, military officers and great powerful motherfuckers.

And yet, almost all of us were just goddam cogs in the wheel, humping ruck and hoping not to die.

That's just not glorious or interesting enough for 'em, I reckon. Even though it's been the foot-soldier that's been the eyewitness to history from Rome to Normandy. The wannabes need to re-think it. Because while they dream of being hunched over a map with Napoleon six hundred meters from the action, there are people who actually SAW what happened.

Who put rounds downrange and carried back the cost. Why wouldn't you wannabe one of THEM? What's WRONG with these assholes?

J— said...

According to the Twitter, the Correction Alpaca is busy preparing for "war." Over this.

Dan Coyle said...

I love how this judgmental asshole Graham initially defended himself with "I take people at their word!" Unless they lean left of him, then... Well, read his stuff.

Smut Clyde said...

Naming the supposed integrated force after a comic-book publisher should have been a giveaway.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

And they’d take the best of the best…and create one unit.

VPR?

I was only with the Great Berets for a year when I decided to join what was called the 'Apache' at the time. They were a mixture of funky 70s people. It was not just Funky Dudes with moustaches,it was groovy chicks with buckskins, it was everyone.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

According to the Twitter, the Correction Alpaca is busy preparing for "war." Over this.

Re:

In a panel appealing to conservatives under 30, Jason Mattera, author of a forthcoming book called “Obama Zombies: How the Liberal Machine Brainwashed My Generation,” likened the gathering to “our Woodstock.”

Except nothing was brown, not even the acid.

J— said...

I love how this judgmental asshole Graham initially defended himself with "I take people at their word!"

Also with this blustering distraction:

My personal motives for publicizing anyone who wants to help out in Haiti are humanitarian only, and anyone who impugns those motives should arrange to meet me for a fist fight.

Very amusing.

J— said...

I was only with the Great Berets for a year when I decided to join what was called the 'Apache' at the time.

You don't say. Around the same time I joined an elite airborne unit called the Seminole Wind.

Substance McGravitas said...

an elite airborne unit called the Seminole Wind.

Needs a logo. I picture Chief Wahoo on all fours looking between his legs at you.

Another Kiwi said...

I joined an blowhard unit called the Bozell

lawnguylander said...

Favorite comment:

I can personally vouch for Gary Graham here. And his actions have already spoken to his veracity. The fact that he was duped by this idiotic douche has no bearing on him.

It's a mistake to think that the Correction Alpaca would be of any use here. It has been bred to react ferociously to charges of racism against conservatives. When they fall for and publish preposterous claims it gazes down at and roots through the vegetation on the mountainside until it thinks it's safe to look up again. So it's well that the commenters took care of things on their own. I am not surprised that they think this is more a job for the Vengeance Vicuña and they are out to see this Witt guy go to jail.

mikey said...

Dammit. I ran around with guns and grenades and shit and met green beanies and belgian spooks and cia operators and NOBODY ever wanted me to join in any reindeer games.

Who do ya gotta fuck around here to be a hardass stone killer, fer crissakes...

J— said...

Needs a logo. I picture Chief Wahoo on all fours looking between his legs at you.

Possible mottos:

Ezekiel 13:13. "In my wrath I will unleash a violent wind."

Or simply: "Silent but deadly."

Smut Clyde said...

Who do ya gotta fuck around here to be a hardass stone killer

If this is a ZARDOZ reference, the answer is of course Charlotte Rampling.

Another Kiwi said...

The Vicuña of Vengeance or the Hamster of Hissy fits.


Hey hey there capcha, pukedic? I thought I was funny

J— said...

I just tried to visit Sadly, No!, and holy shit, Apache just took over the site!

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

My personal motives for publicizing anyone who wants to help out in Haiti are humanitarian only, and anyone who impugns those motives should arrange to meet me for a fist fight.

I'd love to take him up on this offer.

Seminole Wind.

Veiled Buttsecks reference?