Saturday, February 13, 2010

Dear Valentine's Day Saps

Listen.

6 comments:

M. Bouffant said...

How are aliens going to play that vinyl thing on their iScrods?

Substance McGravitas said...

It was sent with a player they can eat.

mikey said...

Great. The alien scientists will find this thing, figure it out, build a record player by hand, analyze it to determine the proper rotational speed, and then, with great fanfare throughout their society, they will assemble some of their great thinkers, political leaders and clergy together in a large auditorium and, as the assembled masses draw simultaneous breath in hushed silence, the research team leader gently places the tone arm in the groove and the sounds begin.

At the end there is only the Luft - Luft - Luft - Luft sound of the needle running out of the groove, until the research team leader gently lifts the tone arm off the record, for they never thought about automating that process.

The silence goes on for a long time as the assembled throng processes what they have just heard. Finally, it is one of their leading Behavioral Scientists who speaks.

"Goddam, this fucking race of alien creatures had a serious ADHD problem, didn't they? They couldn't even wait for one song to finish before starting another. I suspect they would have killed themselves off long ago, out of impatience and lack of concern about the future"....

Smut Clyde said...

How are aliens going to play that vinyl thing

They will hold it up to reflect the light and admire the subtle variations in the diffracted colours across its radius from the varying spacing of the groove and the varying spatial frequency of the wiggles.

I still think they should have followed Arthur Clarke's suggestion and put a copy of the Donald Duck cartoon, "Modern Inventions". But did anyone consult me? Did they bogroll.

Another Kiwi said...

The Donald Duck story, a favourite.
Liberals sent our brain waves to space!!! get your tinfoil hats, here!!!

Kathleen said...

I listened to a podcast about that, and Annie talked about her and Carl Sagan falling in love while working on it. It was super romantic. So excellent choice for VDay SM!