Thursday, February 11, 2010

Fuck The Olympics

Holy cow!

Police investigate suspicious object in North Vancouver!!!

My guess:
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With or without a moustache?

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FUCK THE OLYMPICS!

URPDATE:

Part of the game of the cranky logo is seeing if I can get it into Google's Image Search - so FUCK THE OLYMPICS - but look who's, like, a billion ahead of me:


WITH MY GODDAMNED STORY!

47 comments:

MagicBee said...

What Your GIF, or the Nolympics logo?

Substance McGravitas said...

It is pretty hard to detonate a GIF I guess...

Smut Clyde said...

Has Jennifer been informed?
I would pay to see that GIF broadcast during ad breaks.

MagicBee said...

Burt; how are these relentlessly optimistic youthful snow apes fucking with your buzz. BTW...i take credit for this phrase when , on the way to a Krispy Kreme production cycle, I, in a blissfull state of early Bonghititis, almost got t-boned my a minivan of cheer activists. I said ,"they fucked with my buzz". And it was true. The adrenaline produced faded my classic 19 yr old early stage buzz and made the doughnuts taste that less euphoric. Still, a good memory. But I digress

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

calm down man. put on some Nightwish or something, have some tea and morphine or something...

Substance McGravitas said...

Burt; how are these relentlessly optimistic youthful snow apes fucking with your buzz.

The school my daughter goes to has a bingo night to raise money and 6 or 7 billion dollars are being wasted in front of my eyes.

I don't actually mind the sports or the parties and there'd be no Nixon in China without them of course, but it's a pretty offensive waste. Public opinion is about half-and-half on whether the Olympics were a good idea, so I'm really a pretty run-of-the-mill crank about it.

The overspending on the sports will then be used to justify cuts to, say, the school system I complained about.

J— said...

Maybe that throbbing spider will light the flame tomorrow at the opening ceremony.

Substance McGravitas said...

Have I mentioned that I'm pretty pretty?

Smut Clyde said...

In my limited experience, any suspicious object encountered in North Vancouver is more likely to be a banana slug than a manic spider.

Substance McGravitas said...

Look out!

J— said...

WITH MY GODDAMNED STORY!

Fire him from Blogspot for plagiarism!

Smut Clyde said...

Look out!
Which end is which on that thing?

tigris said...

Aw, lookit the ickle dancing spider! If that doesn't make people love the Olympics, nothing will.

Substance McGravitas said...

If that doesn't make people love the Olympics, nothing will.

Shush or it's the GIANT HOUSE SPIDER for you!

MagicBee said...

Vancouver? Christ.What's the worst that can happen. Snow Mauling? Asian bashomandicus? Nice overhomunculous. Even temperted interuppticus?. Direct visitor getthefuckoutticus?

MagicBee said...

Too many cus's

Smut Clyde said...

Dancing spider GIF needs a cute little Hitler moustache.

tigris said...

Dancing giant house spider with a Hitler mustache would TOTALLY ROCK.

Substance McGravitas said...

Dammit, where'd I put those?

Substance McGravitas said...

The Kirsanowstache beats the Hitlerstache I think. Doesn't have the resonance yet, but give him time.

tigris said...

Looks like you left them in Europe and two small locales in western Canada. The BC spiders appear to be making a run to join their brethren even now setting the stage for Calgary to get the Olympics again.

Hamish Mack said...

Awww! he a cute jumping spid3r!
Gigantic house spiders should have to have "Wide Load" signs on them.

tigris said...

OOOooooOOOOoooo! Dancing spider can be dragged on top of the Olympic-hate logo which makes it strobe like a disco. The addition of a spider porn-stache to the mix is pure gravy.

Substance McGravitas said...

Oh yeah. Didn't crop the spider and the background shows once every five frames.

MagicBee said...

It' stlll enjoyable .It's late here,and I'm beat. Love Bee

Smut Clyde said...

Oh yes, spider looks very dapper with the 'tache and its own rotating eyebrows. On account of having a typical liberal sense of entitlement, naturally I wonder whether the strobing croissant cat irises* would fit it as well.

* Technically 'irides', but I AM NOT A PEDANT.

mikey said...

Now it's true that I'm reading this crap and smiling (I'd smirk, but then I'd have to punch myself in the eye, and there's usually a line for that), but fer crissakes people, don't you have anything else to DO?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Bee, Nightwish is a Northern European operatic-metal band, and frankly I am astonished that Mr Gravity did not rise to the bait. It is almost like he knows the traps of zombies....

But all else being equal, that friggin vibratin arachnid effs up my browsers something fierce. It's not as bad as Jennifer's talking pie, but it is still off-putting.

Substance McGravitas said...

Really? It's 16K!

Substance McGravitas said...

don't you have anything else to DO?

YES, AND I'M STILL NOT DOING IT.

Christ...

mikey said...

Well I had a couple Laphroaigs, made a turkey cutlet cordon bleu (sauteed shallots, mushrooms, garlic and white wine, seasoned floured turkey cutlet, fried up on one side in olive oil, flipped over, topped with reduced mushrooms/shallots, topped with a thick slice of black forest ham and a slice of swiss cheese, finished in the broiler and sprinkled with sweet paprika), pounded half a bottle of sake, made a salad out of fresh spinach, onions and apples and hit it with a honey/mustard/soy/ginger/garlic vinaigrette and a basmati pilaf with herbs and almonds.

Now I need something interesting to do. I'll have a cup of tea and await inspiration...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Really? It's 16K!

well some of us haven't received our Soros check yet, and are still working with LESS THAN OPTIMIZED EQUIPMENT.

plus, if we don't get instant gratification from our blog surfing, we get twitchy.

HIGHER THAN HOEP (WITH WIND SOUND EFFECT)

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

now, see here's where it's at up here by the Big Fresh Water Sources (you westerners can be jealous)

Now I got the ipod randoming the recent stuff, it is mixing up some Paul Weller, some Jam, some dbs; Kirsty Maccoll, Eels, old Todd Rundgren, Glossary, Mars Volta, Luna, Eleventh Dream Day and Sleater Kinney.

And you know what? It WORKS, because of the underlying heart and soul and, yes, integrity. And you may all ridicule my zombitude, but this is what I will go to sleep listening to, and this is what I will wake up to, and dammit, the thrill and rush of creative humanity will allow me to get up one more damn day, and do whatever the hell it is I do otherwise.

Spiders.

Smut Clyde said...

some of us [..] are still working with LESS THAN OPTIMIZED EQUIPMENT.

Story of my life. BUT DO YOU HEAR ME COMPLAINING!?!

M. Bouffant said...

You insert "fuck" in The Google™, & I come up every time.

Saw this today, liked the "No Olympics On Stolen Native Land" Sign. (2:30)

Extra fun: The BBC player vol. goes to 11!

M. Bouffant said...

This is fun too.

fish said...

Why is spider money threatening? I personally think we should return to the spider standard.

Substance McGravitas said...

It was a terrorist fishing rod.

mikey said...

See?

Already a fatal luge catastrophe.

I really think you're selling the whole olympic experience short.

Substance McGravitas said...

Located on Blackcomb Mountain, the 4,757-foot track was completed in December 2007 after two-and-a-half years of construction at a cost of about $105 million.

For $105 million I figure we can kill a few more.

J— said...

Okay, so they may have to import snow for the alpine events, but at least they've go the track at the Sliding Center all set and ready to go. Fucking A.

Substance McGravitas said...

February in Vancouver is generally above freezing anyway so it's the crapshootiest Olympics ever.

J— said...

It looks like the course is too fast.

Substance McGravitas said...

That's what you get when you go to Kmart for your luge track.

J— said...

It brings new meaning to the skeleton event.

fish said...

On Friday, Fendt said in a statement, “This is the gravest thing that can happen in sport"

Indeed the gravest. None graver.

Substance McGravitas said...

Already a fatal luge catastrophe.

If it was the fine American health care system that guy would have been un-battered-to-death immediately!