Monday, January 25, 2010

Stupids for Smartness

A request:
Specifically, I request all documention relative to the degradation of America’s lovely “greenbacks.” I want to know exactly who requested the treasonous changes; exactly who authorized the violation of our classic and signature currency; exactly who implemented the changes. Please include copies of all proposals, agreements, and law(s), including copies of all official signatures, as well as a list of who voted, and how they voted, to change our money. (The coins are looking quite fake, as well. Did all of the treasury artists retire and take the molds with them?)

This is America. It does not belong to the Federal Reserve. It does not belong to the Treasury Department or any usurpers of power, especially any who wish to change America for the worse. We the People want back our lovely, detailed, well-designed greenbacks. Our greenbacks were works of art. Your pastels are ugly; tacky; and off-centered. We the People never gave either of you, nor the federal government, any permission to turn our beautiful, if fiat, currency into pastel-colored, badly designed, worthless-looking representatives — to be sent worldwide — of the (un)stability of America. Who authorized these Euro-style fakes?
Who, you ask, is this dedicated sprinkler of phrases and punctuation?
Linda Schrock Taylor, M.A., taught special education for 35 years in public schools. Now retired from teaching, she is finishing her book for reclaiming lives, “Rapid Reading Remediation;” and is running for Governor of Michigan on a platform for A Constitutional & Literate Michigan.

31 comments:

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I authorized them, ma'am.

It's a harbinger of teh Zombocalypse.

Substance McGravitas said...

I really should have included this bit:

I have never believed the flimsy tale that the weird FRNs are less easy to counterfeit. It is time that you both, plus everyone else involved with the shafting of Americans via the Currency Coloring Game, openly admit that the underlying agenda(s) — is/are treasonous. Directly behind the dishonest manipulation of our currency is… Pastel Gradualism. Gradually people are eased in accepting colored currency like the rest of the world uses. Who authorized the unwanted changes, and the gradualism of currency conversion? I want to know! Tens of millions of Americans want to know, as well. Fabian Socialism. Creeping Progressivism. Now Pastel Gradualism.

J— said...

The Colombian counterfeit dollar industry heartily endorses Linda Schrock Taylor's important effort to save the lovely greenback from the dustbin of currency.

Substance McGravitas said...

You can at least point to Linda and say "That there is a real conservative."

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

green isn't a color?

Smut Clyde said...

Stamps, too. The Post Office regularly issues new stamps and do they consult The People first? Do they bogroll! Bring back the Penny Black, sez I.

Pastel Gradualism is just the start. The next step will be...
wait for it...
Metric measurements! Ho ho!

Smut Clyde said...

green isn't a color?

Come to think of it, a real bastard country would cover the currency with coloured dots, in which normal-trichromat observers can see "$10" (say) while the colour-deficient sector of the population read it as "$2".
Think of the hilarity that would ensue.

Substance McGravitas said...

our beautiful, if fiat, currency

WTF is she complaining about? She already has small shitty underpowered foreign currency!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Pastel Gradualism is the Metric System of Liberal Fascism.

Color is Theft.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

off-centered

SHIFTING THE BALANCE TO THE LEFT!!!

Substance McGravitas said...

Bring back the Hues UnAmerican Activities Committee!

Substance McGravitas said...

Think of the hilarity that would ensue.

I propose that further innovation should involve the Smell Test.

Smut Clyde said...

Snorting white powders? Surely not. I had merely rolled up those banknotes in order to apply a Smell Test.

Smut Clyde said...

In New Zealand, you know, for a small extra fee you can order your banknotes with your own personalised vanity serial numbers. That's how the Reserve Bank covers its costs. It was either that or accept advertising on the backs.

WV = 'clings', which is so not true -- I prefer to think of myself as 'emotionally retentive'.

Substance McGravitas said...

In New Zealand, you know, for a small extra fee you can order your banknotes with your own personalised vanity serial numbers.

BOOBS. Ha! Ha!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

is this woman the same one who forced her son to smoosh his hamster with a hammer?

Substance McGravitas said...

Smush; crush; pound that hamster, until it's fiat.

Smut Clyde said...

It is a sad comment upon the young people of today that Rapid Reading Remediation texts need to involve the crushing of hamsters in order to seem relevant and keep their attention.

See Patch the Hamster. Patch is a Detainee.
See John waterboard Patch.

Substance McGravitas said...

Who'll save him, from being a Ham-Ham?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

This is America. It does not belong to the Federal Reserve. It does not belong to the Treasury Department or any usurpers of power,

With the welcome actions of the Suprme Court, it does, however, now belong to Halliburton, Boeing, GE, et al....

I for one welcome our merciless faceless corporate bastard overlords.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

I, for one, don't give a damn about a greenback dollar.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

You've all stolen the good comments already.

This is most objectionable. And I don't even see fish.
~

J— said...

I prefer my dollars funky.

Substance McGravitas said...

Get a load of Bony Fingers.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

do away with that pesky JOB, Mr. Thunder.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I'm not sure active action on my part will be necessary, ZRM.
~

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

yes, welcome to the post-bubble economy, my friend.

Of course, your betters in the top offices of those big bank buildings will be CASHING those bonus checks...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

A Constitutional & Literate Michigan.

not sure that's possible.

M. Bouffant said...

CLaM!

Substance McGravitas said...

Clams are always funny.

fish said...

This is known as the monkey corollary.