Telepathic Ed has a picture-perfect old-man rant. No excerpting, it's too good as one block of prose poetry.
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RAGE BEFORE BEAUTY
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Free Things
For most folks:
Edit images with The GIMP
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Replace Microsoft shit
Here are around 2000 rss feeds for your reader of choice.
For Mac folks:
Edit text with Textwrangler
Everything is easier with Quicksilver
For Windows folks:
Automate everything with AutoHotkey
Use Launchy instead of navigating folders
Edit images with The GIMP
Draw with Inkscape
Record and edit sound with Audacity
Make nonsense with JanusNode
Replace Microsoft shit
Here are around 2000 rss feeds for your reader of choice.
For Mac folks:
Edit text with Textwrangler
Everything is easier with Quicksilver
For Windows folks:
Automate everything with AutoHotkey
Use Launchy instead of navigating folders
17 comments:
The vid made laugh out loud because it's just so damn weird. Wait...that old guy isn't you, is it?
I actually read the whole Ed thing.
Apparently not pro-war: good!
Apparently racist: not as good :(
Some stupid commenter at ed's place:
Getting your brains beaten into jelly is a lofty goal, while attaining the office of the Presidency isn't?
Ruff! Ruff! Meeow! oink! oink!
Ruff! Ruff! Meeow! oink! oink!
Ed knew that guy was going to say that.
That might be Ed's second comment or something.
I hope he follows the link back to my joint. We don't have enough full-goose-bozo loonies over there.
Well. Clearly I've been wasting my time at your blog.
Ultra tight on first edition cover so that you can only see the headshots. Slow pan out, book is lying a man's chest. He's lying down on a park bench, head turned away from camera.
Cut to Michael Bay style camera spin shot as Also Spach Zarathustra starts playing. Man stands up, it's Telepathic Ed (played by Clint Eastwood).
After music ends, the entire post is delivered as continuous monologue with no breaks. Camera continues spinning with occasional hard cuts to flashes of imagery from text (war scenes, unruly mobs, boxers, assorted black men, &c.) - slowly rising a la Johnny LaRue Crane Shot. Fade to black. The words "good talk" appear on screen, linger for a second, then also fade.
Roll credits.
Well. Clearly I've been wasting my time at your blog.
we usually don't count "wearing inappropriate footwear" as "full-goose-bozo loony" at the Empire.
I will have to work on my batshittery. I have lots of tapes of Michelle Bachmann--she will show me the way!!
I think you need perpetually lubricating eyes to keep them open like that.
a video of VS walking up to a Man in The Street interview, wearing painful footgear and holding Golf Baby, and then VS making barnyard noises, would definitely qualify.
Cut to Michael Bay style camera spin shot as Also Spach Zarathustra starts playing. Man stands up, it's Telepathic Ed (played by Clint Eastwood).
Camera? Ed will beam the images right into your brain!
WV's become sentient- "Pated"
I think you need perpetually lubricating eyes to keep them open like that.
Or a tongue long enough to lick the corneas clean in lieu of blinking.
Rant needs more parallax.
Wait...that old guy isn't you, is it?
It was very polite of Substance not to comment on resemblance between old dude and Herr Doktor Bimler.
I've seen a pic of you. There is no such resemblance...though I can totally see you making random animal noises.
I do not rate for farmyard impersonations. When the Doktorling was much smaller and I was expected to sing about Old MacDonald, his farm soon came to include daleks ("With EX-TER-MIN-ATE here and EX-TER-MIN-ATE there"), tribbles and Shuggoths.
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