Wednesday, October 28, 2009

A Tragedy

For some reason I don't visit The Onion much these days. All that gravitas goes to your head.
Man Dies After Secret 4-Year Battle With Gorilla
October 26, 2009 | Issue 45•44

ROANOKE, VA—Local claims adjuster David Seaborne, a devoted husband and father of three, died Tuesday at the age of 37 following a long and painful personal battle with a 512-pound eastern lowland gorilla.

4 comments:

J— said...

Who needs the Onion when you have Michael Steele, Michele Bachmann, Orly Taitz, and Silvio Berlusconi, just to name a few.

herr doktor bimler said...

I've been watching the NY-23 election campaign because in New Zealand we do not have enough train crashes of our own. OK, a stream of Republican Party bigwigs endorse the third-party candidate in preference to the candidate put forward by the local Republican organisers. But when one of them claimed that he was doing so in the name of party loyalty, that's when I began to suspect that all these news items were actually written by Carl Hiassen.

M. Bouffant said...

I hate that "after a long struggle/battle w/ (usually) cancer" crap. I bet most people just give up & die the minute they get the diagnosis.

herr doktor bimler said...

It goes along with "fighting for life in hospital". When people die in the IC Ward, it's their own fault for not fighting with sufficient determination.