Saturday, April 14, 2012

Dumbing Yourself Into a Corner

Sooner or later you're gonna lose the droolers, and those who can't feed themselves are not a reliable voting bloc.



A further example:



Let me explain the joke: 17-year-old Trayvon Martin was pursued and killed by a guy who wasn't arrested for it, and the president said "If I had a son he'd look like Trayvon."

As all right-thinking people understand, the murder of a kid is equivalent to someone being mean to a millionaire who said a dumb thing.

Also: Rush was born in 1951 and Ann Romney was born in 1949, but drugs really age you.

18 comments:

vacuumslayer said...

I would think that, on so many days, you wake up happy to be Canadian.

J Neo Marvin said...

What the fuck was THAT?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Point of order, Your Honor!

1) If Rush had a daughter, she would look like one of these Bufo marinus tadpoles.

2) I believe your youtuber offerings for the day would be enhanced (further) by this one.
~

tigris said...

What's with the bible verse? It makes it look like Herman Cain is being punished by God via Obama. What a hash.

vacuumslayer said...

Did i take some drugs without realizing it?

Substance McGravitas said...

2) I believe your youtuber offerings for the day would be enhanced (further) by this one.

The Ramones, to their credit, didn't wanna be pinheads no more.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

The way things in the U.S. are going, fleeing to Canada is looking like an option. Can I live above the garage and be your "Fonzie"?

"AAAAAYYYYY, Mr McG!"

Substance McGravitas said...

The problem with Canada is that nobody goes "WwwwwwWWWOOOOOOOOOoooo!" when you show up.

vacuumslayer said...

I just cancelled my trip. I bet you jerks don't even do The Wave.

mikey said...

I'm starting to lose my temper with these fuckers.

First they made the word "Liberal" toxic. In what is commonly referred to as a "Liberal Democracy".

Then they took the most radical, reactionary political philosophy imaginable and called it "Conservatism".

Yeah. To the point where Mitt Romney, in his endless attempts to curry favor with the powerful toothless inbred illiterate voting bloc, described himself as a "Severe Conservative". Nobody knows what that means, but it certainly sets expectations around a lot of body bags and prison camps.

Ok. Fine. Fuck you, one and all, but it's all that whole not-beanbag thing we keep hearing about n shit, right?

But now, you have a fuckwad with a pistol shoot an UNARMED KID to death for no reason other than tribal hate and fear and this fuckwad is the fucking victim?

Ok, stop the bus. This is where I gotta get off. Here, somewhere between Orwell and South Park, I'm not sure I can trust myself to keep suppressing my sense of justice...

wiley said...

Catapulted and skeet-shot rabbits. Obama as Zombie Death.

Perhaps the difference between an analogy and the product of a psychotic mind full of schizoid nightmarish images should be just a little more clear than this.

Substance McGravitas said...

Badass Grim Reaper Dr. Obama really smoked Herman Cain, but where was the guitar solo?

M. Bouffant said...

Glad to see "drooler" catching on.

Substance McGravitas said...

Hmm...that was probably your fault. You're the only mention of it here prior to this.

Another Kiwi said...

David Attenborough (whispering): We're very close here to seeing Limbaugh's Laffing Highenna. We have to be very quiet and very still because it is a very shy, elusive creature.
Limbaugh: If I had a daughter, she would look like Ann Romney.
DA: Well there it was the very elusive and deservedly ignored, Limbaugh's Laffing Highhenna. We'll show it again, in slo-mo.
L: (slowed down sentence)
Audience: WTF! There's nothing there! Just some old drunk yelling at clouds!
D.A: Well yes, but that's what it looks like
Audience: What about some monkey sex, that's always funny.

Substance McGravitas said...

Funny sex in humans requires rubber chickens. Or was it squirting daisies?

Smut Clyde said...

Squirting rubber chickens. Also speeded-up Benny-Hill-style motion, and Yacketty Sax.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

"Rush: If I Had A Daughter, She Would Look Like Ann Rmoney"

Ok, I like the prog-rock trio as much as anyone, but that song just sucks.