Monday, February 27, 2012

Sons of England

When last we visited the International Metaphysical University it concerned crazy person Rupert Matthews, a faculty member of IMU who was in line to succeed mildly less crazy Conservative Roger Helmer as member of the European parliament for the East Midlands. On this front Helmer speaks:
In October, I announced my intention to resign from the European parliament on Dec 31st. I was asked by our Delegation Leader Martin Callanan to postpone that date to Jan 20th to cover some key votes in Strasbourg in January, which I agreed to do. However I have not yet signed the Parliament’s formal deed of resignation.

I made it clear at the time that a key reason for my decision was my disillusionment with a wide range of Conservative policies – a view which has been strongly reinforced by David Cameron’s vocal backing for further fiscal integration in the EU.

I announced my resignation in the confident expectation (shared by just about everyone) that I would be replaced by the Next-in-Line on the 2009 Conservative East Midlands list, Rupert Matthews. Since the introduction of the regional list system of voting, there have been nine mid-term vacancies for UK MEPs, and on every occasion the seat has gone to the next available name on the list.

It has now emerged, however, that the Party has reservations over the succession. After the 2010 General Election, a large number of very good people, including Rupert, were taken off the Westminster candidate list. Because he is not currently on that list, the Party has referred his case to the Candidates’ Committee, which will require him to undergo a Candidate Panel.
AHA! The Tories have been tipped off that they may be embarrassed by a loon that is not the right kind of loon. What does Roger think?
I have made it clear that I will not sign the formal resignation papers until the position is clarified and Rupert is confirmed. I was happy to resign in favour of the Next-in-Line in the normal way, but I am not prepared to stand aside for some A-List Cameron protégée from St. John’s Wood.

However the Party says it will not call the panel and make the decision until I do resign. So we have a Mexican stand-off.

I think that both I and Rupert (and our respective families) are entitled to some certainty and resolution on the issue. Accordingly I have indicated to the Party Chairman that if the situation is not resolved within a few weeks, I shall withdraw my offer to resign. I am quite prepared, if necessary, to stay in place for the remaining 2½ years of my mandate, until 2014.
Like a True Conservative™, he will not brook reasonless change and will piss in the party's punchbowl until mollified.

Where was I?

Oh yes. The preceding was all super-fascinating of course, but neither here nor there compared to the important news. LOOK!
Many in the metaphysical world have talked about the mysterious Planet X showing up in 2012. This supposition was first introduced by Zecharia Sitchin in the 1970′s and has stuck around as a sort of folk lore ever since. Yet many people are now posting photographs and video indicating that we are having “two suns” showing up in the sky, one of which is purported to be Planet X.

The following two photos were both taken here in the Mid-Ohio Valley; one right her in Parkersburg, WV and one near Columbus, OH. I would be interested in hearing everyone’s comments.

What do you think? Two suns? Is it Planet X? What is your explanation?
I believe the enlightened traveller of the bloggy neighbourhood knows what is coming next.
Notice the beams of light shining down from the sun and yet there appears to be a second object in the sky that also looks like it could be a sun off to the right. Hmm. Is it the moon? Seems like an odd time and placement for the moon but if anyone knows for sure I’d like to hear.
You can see the second “sun” off to the left. Now this could simply be a glare of some sort except that it showed up in a second photo taken shortly thereafter. (Below).
Still there! lol. So let me know you’re thoughts. It certainly makes for interesting and thought-provoking conversation whatever you believe. Also, if you have pictures that show something similar we’d like to see it. :) Send it to
THAT, my friends, is a fucking orb-perception FAIL. University my arse. Two suns would mean the UK would be sunny and everyone knows it is a drab fucking nightmare plus fights in pubs. Also I look out the window now and I see it is night-time, and if there were two suns it stands to reason that it would be TWICE AS NIGHT-TIME. Where's your second sun NOW, genius? Thundra, get on the intertrons and let these idiots know what the orbs are all about. You too Mr. Collins.


Another Kiwi said...

I will stand for this bloke's seat. I also have disdain for Engerland Tories and think that they are loons. I do doubt the presence of a second planet but, whatever, I can wing it.
Thundra, with all his sciencey stuff is welcome to his opinion.

Smut Clyde said...

If you cannot buy and sell European Parliament seats, or hand them on to the oldest son of the fambly, then people will never know whether they are valuable or not. This is why we HAVE MARKETS. Harumph.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

a faculty member of IMU


That explains everything.

We will soon be reading about this fellow's academic orbiturary, he chortled.

Smut Clyde said...

I liked this part:
I am quite prepared, if necessary, to stay in place for the remaining 2½ years of my mandate, until 2014.

He is prepared to bite the bullet and CONTINUE DOING HIS JOB (i.e. representing the people in the Midlands electorate) if his party do not bend to his will and rearrange the party list so that his mate represents them instead. He is willing to GO ON BEING MISERABLE voting for policies that he doesn't support, unless he is replaced by someone else who doesn't support those policies either, rather than by someone who *does* support them and can vote for them without being miserable.

Perhaps he has over-rated the strength of his bargaining position.

Substance McGravitas said...

You forget: he is saying mean things about his former party.

Smut Clyde said...

Ah, but he hasn't promised to *stop* saying mean things about them.
I have no idea why the Tories are choosing such dim bulbs for the European parliament. It is not as if they are reserving their best and brightest for Westminster.

wiley said...

I say moon. Suns don't have shadows.

Substance McGravitas said...

I have no idea why the Tories are choosing such dim bulbs for the European parliament.

Maybe it's a demonstration of how terrible the European parliament is.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

What do you think? Two suns? Is it Planet X? What is your explanation?

On Planet X, o-o-oh, it won't be long now!

I do doubt the presence of a second planet but, whatever, I can wing it.

I doubt the existence of a second hemisphere- I think you're really commenting from Planet Kiwi!

mikey said...

Planet X?


That's the best you can come up with? Planet X?

Hokay, lemme help you out a little bit here.

First, c'mon, you want a dramatic name. You're revealing a fucking PLANET nobody even knew was there, fer crissakes - you want a name with power, drama, im-PACT. To that end, you don't create a name for a major discovery by using the species and some designator. What sounds better? "Dinosaur Q" or "Tyrannosaurus Rex"? There, y'see what I'm saying here?

This is not a field in a key/value store - user/fred - this is a goddam Planet and I expect my heart to beat a little faster when I hear its name. You roger?

Sheesh, it's like naming planets with my sisters kids or something...

Substance McGravitas said...

It's easy to find if you know where planets A B and C are.

mikey said...

"Duck Dodgers"

Sounds like a teevee show...

Smut Clyde said...

That's the best you can come up with? Planet X?


Another Kiwi said...

Planet Claire

fish said...

AK steals from my future and I get blamed.

Planet Claire.

tigris said...

Since Pluto's been downgraded it's planet IX now.