Wednesday, August 11, 2010

A Portrait of Edmonton

Dear dumbasses: build the wall higher so passers-by won't have to puke at your pathetic ideals.*

The city of Edmonton Alberta is a godforsaken hellhole inhabited only by those who can't bring themselves to leave.

I had a good cackle at Ukraine's industrial nightmares surrounding their cities: Edmonton is not all that different. In between vacant lots, giant cloverleafs of overpass traffic, oil refineries and their industrial offshoots and farm-product processing concerns are soulless modern suburban constructions in tan and beige only partially hidden from howling vehicular traffic by barriers apparently - see above for FAIL - meant to keep noise out.

Though their downtown has been largely ruined by isolating it from living spaces via networks of freeways, the local art establishment had the good sense to host a Warner Brothers exhibit AND an Escher exhibit while I was there. Fun was had although the building itself is a very ugly and cold echo chamber that still smells of treated concrete. That's Edmonton (except for the biting insects which are slowed by a merciless eight months of winter).

Have I mentioned that I lived there once?

This in-the-Bouffant-style hate reminds me that Thers is smart.


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

At least it isn't speeled Edmundton.

M. Bouffant said...

Six mos. in Houston, the moral equivalent.

The biennial was on. No wonder.

You see this guy?

Thers must've dropped by the ol' homestead on a prolific day & figured quantity was quality.

Willy said...

From MB's link:


“Plays the part of double adds on girl’s skull short oar by the jewellery to produce the young married woman extra special pleasure plastic sensitive head toy.[...]"

There's a touch of Swank in everybody.

Dragon-King Wangchuck said...

City of Champions!

mikey said...

Gawd that's depressing.

Is there NOTHING to differentiate it from Silli Valley? Other than perhaps cleaner air and taller mountains.


Gyrofrog said...

Other than the part about oil refineries, and a thriving art scene, it could have been a rant from a former resident of Arlington (Texas). A nice place to be from.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

The city can't be all bad, after all, there's a dinosaur genus named for it.

Of course, this makes Edmonton a logical location for a large hadrosaur collider.

Substance McGravitas said...

Given the traffic circles I am certain that Edmonton is already home to many collisions.

Is there NOTHING to differentiate it from Silli Valley?

I don't recall frontage streets off the freeway for housing developments there, but I can't say I've explored the area in-depth.

No mountains, it's a prairie, and oil refineries are burning off waste gas within city limits.

It's windy though.