Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Rude Jerks

I'm half a year late on this*:
Spare me the stories of your "genius" tech-savvy child who can name every country on Google Earth, or how, because of your iPhone, BlackBerry and three cell phones, you juggle 20 tasks at once and never miss any business—even at 4 a.m., because you sleep with your portable devices. Does anyone care that technology is destroying social graces and turning people into rude jerks?
That was Rachel Marsden. Let's observe the social graces in action:
On the following day [Jimmy] Wales announced on his Wikipedia user page that he was no longer involved with her. In return, [Rachel] Marsden, who claimed to have learned about the breakup by reading about it at Wikipedia, turned to eBay and put up for auction a t-shirt and sweater with white stains that she claimed belonged to Wales.
In the past you'd have to auction your ex-lover's come-stained clothing by standing on an upturned shopping cart on the streetcorner while your cats meowed for food that would never arrive. Such were the social graces of the time.

*Wall Street Journal? Surely even as a grunty little Malebeast I am entitled to one "Who'd she blow?" in my lifetime.

25 comments:

ckc (not kc) said...

And guess what? If you died tomorrow, I'm fairly certain that your family could still feed all your funeral attendees with a couple of sandwich trays.

...but there'd probably be a nice display of clothing with white stains to remember you by.

M. Bouffant said...

The more cynical among us would ask, "Who didn't she ...?"

I think Marsden's trying to work Amy Alkon's side of the street. Maybe someone should warn her. If Alkon goes ballistic when someone uses too much milk, it won't be fun if her livelihood is threatened.

White stains: From frothing at the mouth?

mikey said...

I'm sorry, but I'm confused. You know, you can feed quite an assemblage with a couple of sandwich trays.

Me, I prefer the Hummus, but if they put out a crude eat hey and a few sandwich trays, dood, I'm so NOT gonna give 'em a bunch of shit.

Now, on the other hand, if it's a few hunks of carrot and broccolli and a bunch of attitude, I'll very likely piss in the hydrangeas, but we're talking about an honest effort here, right?

Right?

Smut Clyde said...

Hmmm, asparagus rolls.

Smut Clyde said...

That Encyclopedia Dramatica entry is a thing of beauty.

tigris said...

Hmmm, asparagus rolls.

I suppose it might if you were to give it a good push on an incline.

Captcha says one of our submarine sammiches is missin.

fish said...

[points finger at ear, makes circling gesture and koo koo sounds]

Gregory Kohs said...

Here's an interesting game.

Find someone who loved, liked, or admired Jimmy Wales BEFORE he co-founded Wikipedia (that is, before January 2001).

Then, ask them now if they still love, like, or admire The Jimbo.

I'll be waiting here for any responses that come back "Yes".

Substance McGravitas said...

Would I discount the possibility that Jimmy Wales is an awful human being? NEVER!

J— said...

Grunty little Malebeast
Hopping through the forest
Picking up the field mice
And bopping them on the head

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I wouldn't wait around here, Gregory, unless you want the zorbs to eat you.

Or if you have a fondness for Cookie Monster Death Metal bands from Northern Europe.

zeppo said...

Hummus sucks.

Substance McGravitas said...

Hopping through the forest

Okay, that'll last forever.

Brando said...

In Ms. Marsden's defense, when she is harassing an ex-boyfriend, she simply wants his undivided attention, not him on his iPhone calling the police. Good manners are essential to polite society!

Smut Clyde said...

I suppose it might if you were to give it a good push on an incline.

Asparagus rolls like a TIGRIS IS BANNED.

mikey said...

I'm thinking that the next time I'm in an argument, regardless of the subject matter in dispute, I'm just going to accuse my tormentor of sleeping with their portable devices. That should end it in my favor, n'est ce pas?

tigris said...

You can't ban me here! You're, well I don't know what since I can't ban you here either, BUT IT'S BAD. Hmph, grunty male beasts.

mikey said...

Don't sweat it Tigris, everybody knows Smut Clyde sleeps with his portable devices...

J— said...

grunty little Malebeast

New post at the OC Weekly today and Squeeky is rolling.

Substance McGravitas said...

Yeah, I saw. She's a feature act for sure.

Smut Clyde said...

Portable d-vices? What?

Smut Clyde said...

Just looked at the 'vacancies' section on that D.Vice website, but there are no openings (as it were) for vibrator repair mechanics.

Substance McGravitas said...

The non-portable vibrators are problematic, so I salute making them easy to move without some sort of wheeled sledge and tractor.

mikey said...

The problem is that there is no vocational school. You learn vibrator repair at the knee (as it were) of the user. It's not anything they can teach you, for there is no standardized design or even regular approach to vibration, no UVT port you can use to drain the wine out of the bored mother, is all I'm saying...

Another Kiwi said...

Hah! Vibrator repair men! Can you get one when you need one? I don't think so.