Thursday, April 15, 2010

Heroes of Big Hollywood

April 14, 2010:
Must be nice being a leftie and NEVER having to worry about some childish television creator taking a gratuitous shot — from completely out of nowhere — at what you believe in. Not so for we righties.

[...]

“Glee” spent all of last season building up buzz and an audience, and as soon as they get one: POW!

Screw you, righties. We don’t like you and we think you’re stupid for liking Palin.

April 15, 2010:
Slated for release on August 6, 2010, “The Other Guys,” written by Adam McKay and Chris Henchy and starring Will Ferrell and Mark Wahlberg (whose “funky” credentials expired a long time ago)

[...]

Okay, then, how about the old standby villains – Eurotrash terrorists as seen in films like “Die Hard,” “Nighthawks” and just about any Bond film you can mention? Nah. Been there, done that. This is 2010, baby – it’s a new decade in a relatively new century, so we have to keep up with the times. According to the script, the villains in “The Other Guys” are…drum roll please…

Bankers.

[...]

But more importantly, our eeevil banker has even more eeevil Blackwater security contractors – I mean, mercenaries – protecting his sorry ass. You may not know this, but Blackwater used to have “long ties to the White House and prominent Republicans.” Speaking of Republicans, guess who the Big Villain, Carl Bastion, hangs out with? Get ready for the sucker punch moment:

Dick Cheney.
A Cheney/Palin ticket in 2012 would be awesome.

22 comments:

Snag said...

If by awesome you mean a singularity of evil.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Cheney has no chance against Michele Bachmann.
~

Substance McGravitas said...

Dreaming up imaginary vote margins makes me cackle.

M. Bouffant said...

We're going to have to check everyone's "funky" credentials before we let any of you go.

Just wait w/ the others over there.

fish said...

Hey they were not cheap shots at Cheney, Blackwater, and bankers, they cost us dearly in blood and treasure.

Smut Clyde said...

everyone's "funky" credentials
I think the state of my socks speaks for itself.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

M bouffants new avatar has a Zombie mark, for beginner zombies.

It's that kind of consideration that indicates changing attitudes toward the formerly breathing.

Huzzah!

J— said...

I thought he was balancing a tinker toy landing pad on his head.

mikey said...

Balancing a tinker toy on my head
Doesn't mean in any way I might happen to be undead
I think the real honest truth ought to remain unsaid
I only wear this for the unparalleled street cred

Substance McGravitas said...

M bouffants new avatar has a Zombie mark, for beginner zombies.

I believe you may find the goods within too crunchy.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

A Cheney/Palin ticket in 2012 would be awesome.

Who would shoot whom in the face first? Would it be a mutual exchange of gunfire during a canned hunt?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Crunchy Brain?

Well, if you took the diodes out, it wouldn't be crunchy now would it?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

you know, we need a zombie superhero.

Substance McGravitas said...

Define "we" dead man.

Also Dead Girl was pretty entertaining.

Substance McGravitas said...

Well, if you took the diodes out, it wouldn't be crunchy now would it?

He's an android.

Man, I could fake you out with a fuckin' Chatty Cathy couldn't I?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Man, I could fake you out with a fuckin' Chatty Cathy couldn't I?

ZOM NOM NOM first, worry about the contents later.

Sorry, I stopped reading comic books when I was seven.

Substance McGravitas said...

Links too.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

bizzy zombbie. Also, fish has made me very nervous about links.

mikey said...

I think Alice Abernathy of Resident Evil qualifies as a zombie superhero. A hot one at that...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

OTOH, zombies are notoriously bad at the quips.

Smut Clyde said...

Also, use of the word "funky" obliges me to link to "Just Like Vince Taylor".

GeoX said...

No subtext needed--I'm willing to just come out and say it: you’re stupid for liking Palin. Well, for lots of other things too. But Moosegirl worship is emblematic of a lot.