Wednesday, July 22, 2009

To Ass-Rape With Explosives Or Not To Ass-Rape With Explosives

Our man John T. Simpson:
[Do you really think many Lefties, especially the ACLU, would have] given Man On Fire’s John Creasey carte blanche to jam a C-4 Easter egg up a corrupt Mexican cop’s ass in order to extract information on the kidnapping and presumed murder of Dakota Fanning’s Pita Ramos? Ya, as if! Yet in all those cases, those characters get right in our faces and demand of us, “what would YOU do in this situation?”

19 comments:

Mendacious D said...

"What would YOU do in this utterly fictional, never-gonna-happen-in-real-life situation?"

I love the invocation of make-believe.

Substance McGravitas said...

Oh dear. Wondering how many people you are willing to sodomize for freedom gets you the Big Hollywood banhammer.

Another Kiwi said...

Oh fuck, the New Hollywood.
Too many links, too much repetition, too much mouth breathing, too much Benzedrine style luridness, too much horse shit. The deeply flawed moral standpoint is singularly unattractive as well.

tigris said...

I guess you're only allowed to wonder about sodomizing them with explosives. Captcha laments, thus the way of all flesq.

mikey said...

Hey, the whole concept is shitty.

I don't care HOW pissed I am at somebody, I am NOT going to put a bomb, or anything else for that matter, up their ass.

I mean, you don't know what level of personal hygiene you're dealing with here. And at some point the skidmarks and dingleberries are just gonna gross you out.

Nah, do yourself a favor, stick to the needles under the fingernails and a .22 behind the ear.

Yeesh...

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

It’s like Churchill worrying about Hitler calling him a fat cigar-chomping drunk! Who won that fight, and why?

Stalin.
Numbers.
~

Substance McGravitas said...

“what would YOU do in this situation?”

Well John, I think I would have opened up the bad guy's belly and then sewn in some kind of spiny eel that'd wriggle a lot.

D. Aristophanes said...

Whoa ... I came for the Righteous but I stayed for the Substance.

For the record, anyone who would 'jam a C-4 Easter egg up a corrupt Mexican cop’s ass' is a bit of a moron ... all the really hip fictional tough guys know that glyceryl trinitrate alone serves as both lubricant and explosive.

Substance McGravitas said...

Bang him, D! Bang him!

Another Kiwi said...

some kind of spiny eel that'd wriggle a lot.
Bill Kristol is not allowed to be used like that

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I just saw somebody posting as Righteous Bubba on another blog.

You might want to get on top of this situation, S.M.

P.S. As part of my blog exploration process, I have registered my bloglet with technorati. (MAYBE NOW my trackbacksies will finally show up????)

Anywho, they have a sample blog description default: My blog reflects my thoughts and experiences as I help Central Kentucky brides and their families plan beautiful and heartfelt weddings.

Got to keep it, right?
~

Substance McGravitas said...

Good ol' Haloscan or JS Kit or whatever. No global recognition'll do that.

In any case, you've fiddled with both the Backlinks toggle and the Backlinks Default?

Backlinks Show Hide

Backlinks Default for Posts

mikey said...

Backlinks Show Hide

Backlinks Default for Posts

Backlinks with C4 in them

Backlinks covered in efluvium

Backlinks you wouldn't touch with latex gloves

Backlinks you can smell from the 7-11 on the corner



inkse and such as

J— said...

Then our mother came in
And she said to us two,
"Did you have any fun?
Tell me. What did you do?"

"We shoved C-4 up his butt
And blew out all his poo,
So sit down, mother dear,
and try this new stew."

Rusty Shackleford said...

"C-4 Easter egg"? Not sure I'm on board with that messiah.

But it does raise the interesting question of what explosive Jesus would shove up somebody's ass.

mikey said...

Jesus was old school.

He'd just drive one o'those great big ol' hammer forged nails up'ere.

Sauce for the goose, and all...

herr doktor bimler said...

I think I would have opened up the bad guy's belly and then sewn in some kind of spiny eel that'd wriggle a lot.

I deduce that you acquired your moral lessons from watching Beg.

Anonymous said...

Just as an FYI, the "bomb up the butt" concept came from the original novel by A.J. Quinnell. That time, Creasy was a White guy from Tennessee, the story took place in Italy, Creasy's victim was Italian, and Pinta Balletto (the little girl) really did die (her captors had bound her, and she choked on her vomit, and she had been repeatedly raped)

Substance McGravitas said...

Thank you, anonymous person!