Monday, January 2, 2012

Site Hosting Experiments

Well.

Time for a holiday experimental chapeau.



Coolant leak on aisle 12!

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Apparently Google Sites will host an animated gif...



Which fish insists should be crying:

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Hmm, I suppose I should see if Andrew Klavan has said anything dumb recently to justify a four-wheeled skullfuck - but "Cars 2 hentai" is climbing the House of Substance search terms so is jutification necessary? NO. So consider this a totally free boner bonus:
You like movies about gladiators…?

Actually, I do. Is that so wrong??? In fact, Starz’s over-the-top gladiator series, Spartacus: Blood and Sand, was capable of reducing me to an emotional 12-year-old every week. I would stare at each new gore-and-nudity-laden episode in a sort of mindless rapture, thinking, “Look… breasts… sword fights… also breasts…”

Hoping for a similar experience of ecstatic regression, I tried out the recent remake of Conan the Barbarian a few days ago. And let me add that I’m a big fan of Robert Howard’s original Conan short stories, which really are excellent entertainment. And let me also add that there was no shortage of beautiful naked women and good sword fights here as well. But the movie’s a dud. Conan the Disappointment. Not terrible or anything, just sort of flat and ho-hum.

What’s the difference between Spartacus and Conan? It’s the story, brother!
No, it's not an excuse if he meant it to be funny.

UPDATE!!!!

Okay sure, but there is important lab work going on:

12 comments:

Smut Clyde said...

Dragging the drops.
J. G. Ballard would approve.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

The Tears of Klavan
Whom Nobody is Havin'
~

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

what do you have against the guy from Midnight Oil?

fish said...

Ah, the tears are behind Lightning McQueen, how am I supposed to have him crying for the depravity he cannot control?

Substance McGravitas said...

Oh geez, have more tears.

tigris said...

Those are tears? Um, oops.

Substance McGravitas said...

I was gonna darken some of them into an oil leak, but the tentacle monster distracted me again.

tigris said...

Oil? Oh yeah, oil. That's totally the liquid I was thinking of. Yep.

fish said...

Admit it. How cool is this?

Substance McGravitas said...

In my totally unbiased opinion it is a comedy masterpiece.

fish said...

Now I am thinking Lightning McQueen should be drooling instead.

Brando said...

Hope that tailpipe was wiped off before it went on his head.

WV: lumber