Friday, May 29, 2009

Stipulations

I stipulate
That I am great
With perfect-titted gal
I stipulate
A cocktail fete
With secret agent pals
I stipulate
A three point eight
NO WAIT! A three point nine!
I stipulate
A poker date
Would make your money mine
With all these stipulations
And my ever-flowing wit
How, when I stipulate more,
Could you think me full of shit?

Old news.

25 comments:

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

And that english bastard Casement?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

But what about the magic ponies?

Righteous Bubba said...

Okay okay, that was a smashing joke.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

It certainly let some light into that thread.

capcha is subtl. Can you work on the capcha spellchecker?

mikey said...

I checked the capchanary.

"subtl" is correct.

Stipulated.

May I approach the pony?

mikey

Ow. I sprained my cibort

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I thought 'Capchanary" is what all the coal miners have to do when the little yellow bastard gets out of the mine...

Righteous Bubba said...

Oh damn, two eights in there.

Righteous Bubba said...

Fixed.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I'd argue with you more, but right now I have to go meet Someone Super Important, If I said the name you would be amazed, so we can consult on SAVING THE WORLD.

And then come back home to my wife, Diane Lane.

Who is totally cool if I bring Zooey Deschanel home.

It's all because of my SAT scores of three zillion and one.

Righteous Bubba said...

I'm surprised he hasn't mentioned the exotic leather of his boots.

mikey said...

Not to mention his depleted uranium .657 magnum with the custom platinum grips and special wide serrated combat trigger, which he keeps in one of his custom Czechoslovakian leather hand tooled boots, the other containing a switchblade machete with the reverse-honed carbide coated titanium blade...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I am, however, surprised mikey didn't rise to the bait I left in that comment....

pionione. Bubba, this shall not stand.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Sorry, I was too busy playing my special custom made Les Paul owned by Jimmy Page, with platinum fretboard and pickguard made from the tusk of a narwhal. I was writing a new hit song with a famous musician, I can't tell you his name, but if i did you WOULD BE SO IMPRESSED.

I once let the Edge play it at Live Aid, but he got Guiness on it so I made him wash my Testarossa.

Rusty Shackleford said...

I'll be back to kick all your asses later.

mikey said...

Silly zombie.

Do you honestly think I have survived the tumultuous decades collectively known as mikey's exciting amusment park ride without learning not to pick up zombie bait?

Sheesh, whaddaya gotta do to get a little recognition around this dump?

mikey

Righteous Bubba said...

I was baiting zombies with chum until I ran out of people to buy me drinks.

tigris said...

You are indeed a master baiter. Of zombies.

herr doktor bimler said...

what all the coal miners have to do when the little yellow bastard gets out of the mine...

Well they breed down there, you know. It's like the albino alligators in the sewers. Under our feet, the coal mines are slowly filling up with flocks of enraged song-birds, waiting for the day of vengeance when they find their way to the surface.

Rusty Shackleford said...

Being a master baiter of zombies beats being a master baiter of lepers.

mikey said...

I suspect, Rusty, that in the case of lepers it's extremely difficult to accumulate enough experience to acquire the honorific "master"....

mikey

Excuse me, won't you? Me and the monkey are just going to have a little coistr

Righteous Bubba said...

To my regret I find that master baiting has nothing to do with success at mistress baiting.

herr doktor bimler said...

You particularly have to watch out for those zombie lepers.
OMG IT'S STILL MOVING!

If you think the Thomas Covenant novels were a load of pants, imagine how much worse they could have been.

See also "The Beast With Five, no, Four, no, Three Fingers" when it finally emerges from post-production.

tigris said...

Poet(term of art): specialist in per verse communication.

herr doktor bimler said...

I stipulate
That I am great

Is it wrong to keep singing this to the tune of 'O Fortuna'?

capcha is subtl, but it is not malicious, or splike.

Righteous Bubba said...

Orfful.