Black Humorism

Nicholas Eberstadt is outraged at the lack of bloodthirsty monsters in Norway:

Norway’s one-man Rassenreinheitseinsatzgruppe (Google translate it), Anders Behring Breivik, was just given the maximum for his crime in Norway: 21 years.

That’s right: 77 murders (mainly at a summer camp for immigrant children), 21 years.

The demographer in me has to do the arithmetic: This works out to less than 100 days per murder. That’s right: less than a summer per murder.

Bloodthirsty monster Mark Krikorian:

Nick: It’s not much consolation, but the Norway mass murderer (whose name, like the names the Sikh temple shooter or Gabby Giffords’s shooter or the Batman shooter, should be repeated as little as possible, since public exposure is what they crave) will likely spend the rest of his life in prison, since Norway apparently has “preventive detention” after a sentence has been completed. Though, of course, “the rest of his life” should last only until the authorities finish preparing the gas chamber or the gallows.

Or the skullcrusher or chestsmasher or what have you. We can argue about favoured methods of death all day! But here it gets weird:

But “Rassenreinheitseinsatzgrupp” isn’t the right epithet in this case. I have no doubt the creep hates foreigners, but the site of his crimes was not “a summer camp for immigrant children” nor were the victims mainly “immigrant children” — it was a camp for the socialist youth organization, and only a handful of the dead were of non-Norwegian origin. The names of the 77 victims, which should be publicized whenever possible, are listed here.

The absurd sentence did not stem from the fact that Norway “evaluate[s] its own immigrant children’s lost lives as being worth so very, very little.” Rather, Norway, like the rest of the developed world, has become so decadent that it can no longer take the vigorous measures any society needs to defend itself. A self-confident society that wasn’t apologizing for its ancestors and guilty about it success would, in an orderly, law-based fashion, put this fiend to death. He’s laughing all the way to the jailhouse.

Would that I had a komikal kwip to go with this but I don't because what I read there - Krikorian being the lead writer on the Mexican Menace and next in line for Derbyshire-style firing - is Dead Brown People = White Children Saved.

I honestly feel soiled for reading and writing the above. Is it me? Might vigorous defense of a society self-confident in its ancestry mean puppies and cotton candy for everyone?

Basics of Fur Farming and Dog Breeding

Via Hoefler and Frere-Jones

Smelling It

Jonah Fucking Goldberg:

Every now and then I watch the actual broadcast-news shows, just to see what they’re up to. Last night I caught NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams In their story on Augusta admitting women Stina Sternberg of Golf Digest said:

This is a momentous day for the game of golf and sports in general. It’s like the Berlin Wall of discrimination finally coming down in golf.

We could be here all day finding new insights into the absurdity crammed into this soundbite. I have no doubt it is a momentous day for the game of golf. And, I’ll leave it to others to argue how big a deal this is for sports. But the Berlin Wall of discrimination? What the hell?

First of all, the Berlin Wall kept people in, not out (a simple fact countless people still seem not to understand when it comes to, say, the Israeli defense barrier). It kept poor people and rich people alike in (though East Germany’s supply of rich people had a rapid half-life). Was Augusta keeping female golfers locked up in the club pantry?

The Berlin Wall was also a symbol of systematic evil and geopolitical nuclear brinkmanship. Augusta was a symbol of . . . well it was a symbol of various sorts to various people. But in no way was it a symbol of anything like the Berlin Wall save to the very dim or the very ignorant.

Also, let it be known that

THE WHITE MAN IS THE JEW OF LIBERAL FASCISM.

Maybe Stina Sternberg graduated from Swarthmore.

What a Difference Two Hours and Forty Minutes Make

One crazy nitwit:

Polarized News, For Better and Worse
By Stanley Kurtz
August 20, 2012 10:37 A.M.

Newsweek’s cover shocker feels like desperate cry from a dying icon. The magazine long ago discredited itself as a common national source for news, taking leftist opinion-reporting to unprecedented extremes. This brief reversal will be too little, too late for conservatives, merely confirming that Newsweek has lost its bearings. General interest news magazines are so much a thing of the past that serial partisanship is what passes for neutrality now.

A second crazy nitwit:

The Stupids Step In It
By Michael Walsh
August 20, 2012 1:18 P.M.

Honestly . . . just when Newsweek hands the conservative movement a major victory in the MSM wars, along comes Todd Akin to throw the Left a life jacket and change the course of the conversation.

Newsweek is truly a magazine for everyone.

Old Posts About Typography

Hoefler & Frere-Jones have a rarely updated blog, but the RSS feed contains every post back to 2007. If you use Firefox they all load at once. Fun! And clearly in defiance of their design sense.

Blemetheus Brings Fire to Cook Forty For Humans

Beach Zombie

A rare breed.




Flickr here.

Gum

Gum from Cartoon Brew on Vimeo.

Hmm. Vimeo's embedding is kind of sucky. Just click the gum link. Or maybe don't.

Beats a Rock on a Trench

Go here for more.

ITEM! TPM ON THE CASE!

Was it not that?

Just Because

It's not that it's genius or even interesting, but it reminds me that Pearl Jam were always lame.

Search Results Don't Want Jizz All Over Them

Conspiracies Are Our Business...and Business Is Good!

The whole of an item from Big Hollywood (less a picture with a double-neck twelve-string combo of a kind I have not seen before):

Megadeth lead singer Dave Mustaine just uncorked the mother of all conspiracy theories.

The singer told a Singapore concert audience that President Barack Obama is behind the recent rash of gun violence, from the movie theater massacre in Aurora, Colo. to the Sikh temple shooting which took the lives of six worshippers, in order to support a new gun ban.

The president, Mustaine said, is "staging all of these murders, like the Fast and Furious thing down in the border, in Aurora, Colo. all the people that were killed there, and now the beautiful people in the Sikh temple."

"I don't know where I'm going to live if America keeps going the way it's going," he continues. "It looks like it's turning into Nazi America."

Cue the heartfelt apology via Twitter in 3 ... 2 ...

Gosh, it's difficult to tell what the editorial position on this is. Maybe they'll sort it out in the comments thread.

Bus Projects

I've never followed a Photoshop tutorial closely before, but what the heck. Might as well get started.

Initial silliness:



You know, I still have the makings of this around...

TOO-DARK UPDATE:

I tell myself I'm gonna stick with the tutorial and I start adding layers and layers of shit.

Help a Brother Gentleman Out

Participation!



I LOVE TO HELP.

Drink blue pus?
Clink brew thus?
Dink-chew Gus?
Stink poo plus?
Think you suss?

Nonetheless, I love that UndocuBus rhymes with incubus, given what illegal immigration is doing to our country.

Oh fuck off.



TIGRIS AWESOMENESS UPDATE:

"UndocuBus?
An incubus!"
"He raises such a stink," you fuss
"It forces one to think, 'Jealous!
If instead a succubus
were riding his l'il dinky-bus
He would be in the pink, I trust!'"
You recognize a fink and plus
You give the jerk a link, I cuss!

__

I believe we now require the verse tag.

Weathermen Required

Christian Schneider:

Romney’s ideological malleability is well known. As governor of Massachusetts and then U.S. Senate candidate against Ted Kennedy, Romney took politically advantageous positions that seemed to belie his inner conservatism. Whenever he had an argument with himself, it seemed like the other guy always won. As a conservative friend of mine rationalized, “At least he was tricking the liberals, not us.”

But with Romney’s selection of Paul Ryan as his running mate, the era of questioning Romney’s conservative credentials feels like the Mesozoic Era. He delivered conservatism’s most attractive antidote to the Obama economy, which speaks volumes about Romney’s dedication to free-market solutions to the nation’s ills. This glorious flip inoculates him against any previous flops.

I suspect the really annoying uncle is going to GET CHRISTIAN'S NOSE AGAIN!

NO NO NO

Google appears to have upgraded again and Latvian Google now returns English cognates when you look up a guy's name in Farsi.

FUCK

YOU

GOOGLE.

Keeping An Eye On Those Riddled Folks

I Guess I Need Some Animated GIFs of This Guy