Hey, hey, hey! None of that. This is a very sad and tragic time for a very sad and tragic man who had a slab of hot liberal porkulus forced down his throat. And his accountant has started to snicker when he puts that sort of thing under "personal expenses." Also.
I don't see a picture of a guy in a wetsuit. Also.
See, what amuses me is that if you right click in Firefox and select "View Image" on each of those graphics, the file name has a timestamp in it, and with that we can get a rough idea of exactly how much time you spent on this.
And so it came to pass that the fishers went forth unto jesus, and the fishers did say unto jesus "hi jesus". And jesus did say unto them "get thee into my cloaca, so that I may nurture you in the warmth of my excretions". And the fishers did draw back in wonderment and grossness, and they cried out in great consternation "EEEWWWWWW, jesus, are you some kind of pervert or something?" and jesus smiled upon them and said, "behold, for I am the son of god, and you little bastards are going to end up in my cloaca one way or another so do you wanna do this the easy way or the hard way"....
This is a picture of the Great Wide World and the perils that wait for Mark Sanford and Lampwick when they go astray. THE ANGRY BEAVER IS NO METAPHOR AND WAITS TO RUIN YOU TOO.
That'd require me to manufacture one and goofy stick-figures is about it for me and then you gotta worry about the scimitar being mistaken for a cock and then you remember that astronomy prof who clearly got a big thrill out of pointing out Orion's sword and then you think of a case of Rhinelander for under $5 and wow when you combine that with selling blood products you could pretend that piss packed a punch.
Ha ha, I bet you read the words 'erratic capitals' and thought I meant Kabul.
Isn't the capital of Siam the "erratic capital" of Asia?
Perhaps I've been consulting the wrong sites; I'll defer to Herr Doktor's doubtless more intimate knowledge of Eastern Hemisphere vileness & thrill-seeking.
My response to Fuckbar was "I can’t decide if “mirrors and copulation are abominable, because they increase the number or men” or “upward behind the onstreaming it mooned” would be the better catchphrase for a Tlönic cathouse." Though I suppose cathouse is unfortunately nouny... remittable up-sexing?
I for one believe that the British establishment should have awarded Borges an honorary knighthood for his services to literature. Then they could have called him the Unanimous Knight.
41 comments:
Okay, I'm laughing and that's what's important.
Hey, hey, hey! None of that. This is a very sad and tragic time for a very sad and tragic man who had a slab of hot liberal porkulus forced down his throat. And his accountant has started to snicker when he puts that sort of thing under "personal expenses." Also.
I don't see a picture of a guy in a wetsuit. Also.
Oo, good point.
See, what amuses me is that if you right click in Firefox and select "View Image" on each of those graphics, the file name has a timestamp in it, and with that we can get a rough idea of exactly how much time you spent on this.
The thing is I was giggling all the way through.
But a false picture! More time was spent fucking around with The GIMP on various experimental Sanfords. Most of the clip art was snapped later.
The animated stick-figure sanford, the guy who really loves his pasta and the irritable beaver syndrome are by far the best!
Mark is, incidentally, draggable, but to what end I'm not sure.
I thought there needed to be more of a danger element along with the vice, therefore the angry beaver.
Be careful Mark!
You might find him here somewhere.
I sometimes get the feeling you are me, but funnier.
It was late, Mark and I were a bit pissed, he said whaddayasay to a Tatoo and I said The plane boss, the plane is coming...
and then I said "We need a stuffed pig with Jesus on it. He said you're mad where would we get one of them???
And so it came to pass that the fishers went forth unto jesus, and the fishers did say unto jesus "hi jesus". And jesus did say unto them "get thee into my cloaca, so that I may nurture you in the warmth of my excretions". And the fishers did draw back in wonderment and grossness, and they cried out in great consternation "EEEWWWWWW, jesus, are you some kind of pervert or something?" and jesus smiled upon them and said, "behold, for I am the son of god, and you little bastards are going to end up in my cloaca one way or another so do you wanna do this the easy way or the hard way"....
Mark Sanford is everywhere that I.m not.
Yeah, he's everywhere that I'm not.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQ9TfJjKHUM
I'm really Burt Prelutsky, but lazier.
So lazy, in fact, that I have servants to shout at the kids to get off my lawn.
Sounds like Mark had a rough day at the office, then went Galt.
~
Dammit, forgot the bathroom stall.
Not to worry, he'll be back at work tomorrow...
Hmm, capcha is claiming to be a gay singer. Not that there's anything wrong with that
theakin
You can move the Hitler picture too. I have him staring sorrowfully at Sanford, who is dancing with the devil.
I see great potential for slash fiction.
Doesn't Mrs. Sanford qualify as the angry beaver in this amusing clip-art hysterical spasm-inducement?
This is a picture of the Great Wide World and the perils that wait for Mark Sanford and Lampwick when they go astray. THE ANGRY BEAVER IS NO METAPHOR AND WAITS TO RUIN YOU TOO.
Shit, no pool table either.
Also SCUBA dude is surprisingly wetsuit-and-dildo free.
Captcha is drowns?!! OMG IT KNOWS.
Oh jeez, clipart fail. Perhaps I can hire an illegal alien to do this for me before I kill him.
First some demoralization. It's no good without demoralization.
Capcha tells us of the ancient Martial Art of Simitio where the funny curved sword gets caught in ones pantaloons.
That's also a good point.
We require the addition of clip art portraying in comical fashion a man with a curved sword caught in his pantaloons.
He'll be very popular with the wet suit dood AND with the governor...
That'd require me to manufacture one and goofy stick-figures is about it for me and then you gotta worry about the scimitar being mistaken for a cock and then you remember that astronomy prof who clearly got a big thrill out of pointing out Orion's sword and then you think of a case of Rhinelander for under $5 and wow when you combine that with selling blood products you could pretend that piss packed a punch.
This is a picture of the Great Wide World and the perils that wait for Mark Sanford and Lampwick when they go astray.
In that case they should have allegorical names with erratic capitals, like The Beaver Wrath or The Scuba-diver Perversity.
Ha ha, I bet you read the words 'erratic capitals' and thought I meant Kabul.
Now you need a maté gourd, some bolos and a little tango. Sanford has been in the land of beef.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Now you need a maté gourd, some bolos and a little tango. Sanford has been in the land of beef.
Forking path!
Also a big barbecue piled high with meat.
And a bandoneon playing Piazolla. I think the beaver could handle it.
Found a nice video of Piazzolla explaining the bandoneon. Thanks.
Also the appropriate tango for Republicans.
Ha ha, I bet you read the words 'erratic capitals' and thought I meant Kabul.
Isn't the capital of Siam the "erratic capital" of Asia?
Perhaps I've been consulting the wrong sites; I'll defer to Herr Doktor's doubtless more intimate knowledge of Eastern Hemisphere vileness & thrill-seeking.
Katmandu, because furries are super freaky.
Rangoon was eaten by an eggplant, which earns it many erraticity points.
Also, "Tlön, Fuckbar, Orbis Tertius".
My response to Fuckbar was "I can’t decide if “mirrors and copulation are abominable, because they increase the number or men” or “upward behind the onstreaming it mooned” would be the better catchphrase for a Tlönic cathouse." Though I suppose cathouse is unfortunately nouny... remittable up-sexing?
That one's just too hard to do.
"The Eleph" is a story about a point which allows you to see inside every bathroom stall in the universe.
I bet the word "vertiginous" makes at least on appearance in it.
That was no Eleph-ant, sir, that was my pissmire!
Do we go as far as The Circular Pooings?
I for one believe that the British establishment should have awarded Borges an honorary knighthood for his services to literature.
Then they could have called him the Unanimous Knight.
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