Ever notice how as the threat of global terrorism reaches a crescendo, so apparently does the threat of global climate change?No.
The following takes place in an unseen episode of "24."Um, no shit.
The President: "Thank you all. That was great. I've been wanting to do that for a long time. Now, when is the Islamic Republic of Iran's actual Independence Day -- or whatever they call it? Maybe we can send them a cake, or pie, or something."How utterly damning.
Thai 'Spider-Man' to the rescue
An unusual disguise has helped a Bangkok fireman rescue an eight-year-old boy who had climbed on to a third-floor window ledge, Thai police say.
The story of Og and Bog would have no place in hypothetical history were it not for the fact that, apparently, Og went on to father Homo sapiens (“knowing human”) while Bog went on to father an entire subspecies known as Homo sibi destruens (“man destroying himself”). Though they appear physically identical and share a majority of cognitive abilities, Homo sibi destruens (“HSD”) is decidedly different from Homo sapiens in one critical area: they are unable to absorb the lessons of history.Crazy shrooming visions aside, the lesson I see is IT'S ALL ABOUT RACE, PAL.
Standouts of this subspecies can easily be spotted governing countries, running the 111th Congress, starring in films, chairing U.N. committees, controlling the White House and keeping the flames of socialism and communism flickering the world over.
America's current leaders seem to be leading us down the path to European-style social democracy. But although it makes for pleasant livesOh?
the European model stifles human flourishing and erodes the civic and cultural institutions and habits that make for a vibrant, sustainable, and satisfying way of life.Oh.
Moreover, critics of the European model are about to get a boost from scientific discoveries in neuroscience and genetics that human nature is not malleable, which will undercut the foundations of social democracy.Indeed: the Charles Murrays of the world should not be treated as equals because they are dense.
The answer: American exceptionalism, in which individuals freely unite to construct a civic culture.The answer is WE'RE AWESOME!
Last April I had occasion to speak in Zurich, where I made some of these same points. After the speech, a few of the twenty-something members of the audience approached and said plainly that the phrase "a life well-lived" did not have meaning for them. They were having a great time with their current sex partner and new BMW and the vacation home in Majorca, and saw no voids in their lives that needed filling.
Republicans say President Obama is spreading himself too thinly on popular initiatives, while Americans suffer under the burden of a collapsing economy.Bring forth the unpopular initiatives:
BAGHDAD (AP) — A court convicted an Iraqi journalist of assault Thursday for hurling his shoes at George W. Bush and sentenced him to three years in prison, prompting an outburst from his family and calls for his release from Iraqis who consider him an icon for a nation decimated by war.
Dear Lauren: My husband and I are in our early 40’s and have been married fifteen years. We have jobs, two kids, and just like every other couple these days, have a mound of bills to pay. I consider us a normal, American family. In the last few months, my husband and I have been, “experimenting”, in the bedroom. Instead of just regular sex, we’ve been watching porn, roll playing, and playing some games.Okay okay, she asks if she's weird, and in the answer:
Who’s to say that Barack and Michelle Obama don’t roll play, that Nora Roberts and her husband don’t watch porn, or that your next door neighbors don’t play wild sex games after they tuck their kids in at night?Roll play: it's what's for dinner.
Tokyo Rose LaHood: You Want The ChangeAnd so forth. I gather the funny part is that, uh, forget it.
by Tim Slagle
Hello Republicans, This is your old friend Tokyo Rose LaHood. I want to take this moment to say hi to all my fellow Republicans whom I love so dearly.
Don’t you feel silly in your little foxholes, fighting for a cause you cannot win? Europeans are laughing at us. We were the nation that put a man on the moon, and yet we think health care has to be paid for. You are making us the laughing stock of the world.
UC Berkeley leaders warn of cutsWhen you're facing a $70 million shortfall maybe letting Mr. Torture go gets easier.
By Matt Krupnick
Bay Area News Group
Posted: 03/10/2009 04:48:19 PM PDT
UC Berkeley leaders warned today of drastic cuts to campus operations, including layoffs and other staffing reductions.
Continuing and expanding socialist policies doesn't make you a capitalist.He closes with a call to action:
Who Barack Obama really is should now be pretty obvious. But maybe that's the wrong question to ask. Maybe what you should be asking is, who are you? What do you believe in? And, most importantly, what kind of America do you want to live in?Take THAT Thomas Sowell.
First, though, they have to acknowledge that Ted Kennedy, Nancy Pelosi, John Murtha, Dick Durbin, Charles Rangel, Harry Reid and Charles Schumer, are not moderates, but, rather, leftists with a Socialist agenda.Okay, there's Step One. Because it is First. Right?
Furthermore, they must recognize that the New York Times, the Washington Post, the L.A. Times, CNN, the three major networks, the news magazines and the New Yorker, are not objective in their reporting of political events, and neither are Chris Matthews, Keith Olbermann and Bill Maher, in their commentary.This last is surely Step One, you would say to yourself if you were not a hippie anarchist. Yet this fantasy you who pays close attention to Burt Prelutsky is somehow also wrong.
Step #1: It is high time that every American be guaranteed the right to speak freely. It is not reserved solely for left-wing college students who wish to take advantage of the first amendment to shout down conservatives. At the same time, they must not construe the conservative’s right to dismiss them as arrogant idiots as censorship.Faked out! Not Step One but Step #1 because you need to see that little number sign to warn you that A Digit Approacheth, Stupid! In any case free speech is NOT ABOUT SPEAKING FREELY. No construing neither.
Step #2: Affirmative action argues that African Americans and Latinos are intellectually inferior and are unable to compete academically unless other students are handicapped because of their race.At this Second or Fourth Step you might well wonder "Are these really steps? Actual twelve-step programs give direction and aren't just a list of things that the program head is cranky about." Someone is construing and should shut up and watch this drive.
Step #3: Liberals always claim to be in favor of higher taxes, agreeing with Bill Clinton that the government invariably spends money more wisely than those who actually earn it.Ha ha! Burt's got my number! My number three or five. Mind you, Mr. Breitbart is blowing money on Big Hollywood whereas the government could be funding exciting new research and pornography.
Step #4: Even the most secular of liberals seems to believe that Jimmy Carter is a saint.This cult must be eradicated. Without a strong belief in St. Carter no liberal could enact COMMUNISM.
Step #5: Stop insisting that all wars are bad.Attention liberals: all wars are now stinky. Moving on.
Step #6: Repeat after me, “Separation of church and state” exists nowhere in the Constitution.Well, here we have another actual instruction you may follow. Our Step Count is therefore 6 or 8 or 4 or maybe 5, depending. Burt knows enough to KEEP LIBERALS GUESSING.
Step #7: Stop using the word “big” as a pejorative.YES! STOP THAT LIBERALS!
On the other hand, big government, which so many liberals simply adore, represents a usurpation of the allegedly inalienable rights of individuals.ONLY CONSERVATIVES MAY USE "BIG" PEJORATIVELY!
Step #8: Acknowledge that the United Nations is, in the main, an aggregation of venal diplomats who live high off the hog in New York City while representing the most corrupt and vicious regimes in the history of the world.The Maltese may be lying low, but soon the rivers will RUN BROWN WITH MALTEDS!
Step #9: Do not keep insisting that at a time when nearly all the large scale evil in the world is being perpetrated by Muslims that racial profiling is anything but a sensible approach to airport security.Please ignore the pale Yalies.
Step #10: Stop trying to pretend that illegal aliens are the same as legal immigrants just so you can claim the moral high ground and accuse those of us who are opposed to open borders of being racists.Who wants the moral high ground anyway? NICE PEOPLE?
Step #11: Once and for all, stop forgiving murderers.Everyone enjoys a nice smoke after forgiving a murderer, but some of you people are up to two packs a day.
Step #12: Stop bashing the U.S. military and the Boy Scouts.Free speech: SHUT UP or SHUT UP?
The only reason you have the ability to shoot your mouth off is because men and women braver and better than you sacrificed life and limb for your right to do so.Anyone who mentions the ACLU will BE GIVEN AN ADDITIONAL STEP.
Step #13: Let us all agree that while being a woman, a black, a Jew, a Catholic, a Mormon or even a gay, for that matter, should in no way preclude anyone from being elected president of the United States, none of those things constitutes a very good reason to vote for someone.Way to go, smartass. He had to go to EVEN A GAY.
The President, as evidenced by the recent election, is a master salesman. The Salesman-in-Chief. Unfortunately for Mr. Obama, Wall Street is not buying. They are having a tough time wrapping their collective heads around the concept that the way to juice the economy is to plunge the nation into a staggering multi-trillion dollar debt.Everyone knows that the solons of Wall Street are very careful with money which is why everything is perfect.
This free service is run as a hobby of mine.Okay then. Thanks! Seems to lean somewhat to the Bert side of the Bert-Ernie Fun Continuum, so [loses train of thought] Okay, let's enter BUTT. Ha ha! [Whoa, ENTER BUTT!]
Switch Black Euro Push ButtMost satisfying.
Skunkweed Chunky Butt Funky CD
Sensafirm Beginner Butt Plug
3M IDC communication Connectors UY BUTT CONN JELLY
IDC UR-R BUTT CONNECTORS
Boudreaux's Butt Paste
JM CASE READY BUTT/SHANK LSWA
SH BUTT-SHANK PORTION HAM
LOREAL COULUER EXPERTE BUTT
G/N Butt Mini Rice Cake
Beavis And Butt-Head: Butt-o-ween
BGM4 4 BUTT GAUGE MARKER
PIK-A-NUT 20-24 Gauge Waterproff solder filled Butt
ORTHO WEDGE CUSHION/WAGAN TECH
JAMES HAM BUTT PORT
Kick Butt Kombo
Cat Butt Gum - Peppermint
Beavis and Butt-Head Do America (1996) 10th Anniversary Edition
Beavis And Butt-Head Do America (CHECKPOINT)
Beavis & Butt-Head Do America
Of course, [Benedict's] roguish skirt-chasing characters became popular just as Hollywood was undergoing a significant cultural shift: Women were beginning to find a place in Tinseltown. “As more and more women became executives,” he says, “they loved me and they hated me. But when they got power, there was a great joy in being able to tell me what to do when I came in to audition. I think maybe they all had a guy in their past that had some of that in them, and it was revenge.”
Happy Birthday to You! [John J. Miller]There is a smidge more available at the link. Masochists only.
Today is the birthday of the late Dr. Seuss. (Have you seen Google yet?) He certainly wasn't a conservative. The Lorax is a parable of anti-capitalism and The Butter Battle Book is a peacenik's morally equivalent take on the Cold War. Even so, I've always maintained that his book I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew is deeply anti-utopian. Others have extracted a pro-life rallying cry from Horton Hears a Who: "a person's a person no matter how small." And a few have detected anti-socialist themes in Thidwick the Big-Hearted Moose.
