Thursday, May 21, 2009

ATTACKS!

Over at Big Hollywood, AN ALERT!



Oh dear, what could those attacks consist of? Angry grannies dabbing her straight to the emergency room? Supervillains unleashing swarms of carnivorous eyebrowpillars on her? CREED SHREDDING?

It seems that a tabloid picked up some gossip about Carrie Prejean's mom - something that tabloids never do to anyone else who's famous - and the link at Big Hollywood goes straight to ABC which ran with it which is something else that never happened before.

OMG this never happened before either:

13 comments:

  1. I knew this chick in Sausalito who looked JUST like Carrie Prejean. Watched her kill herself with Freebase in significantly less than two years.

    So I have the "advantage" of knowing what she's going to look like as she ages. Not pretty, and in an absolute, not in a relative way.

    But I gotta tellya, the fact that her mom kissed a girl actually makes me loathe her a little less.

    I'm gonna keep my eyes peeled for that upcoming "Carrie and the Girls" DVD...

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  2. Well, I wouldn't necessarily go with "fact" here, except for the relationship of famous people to supermarket tabloid sales.

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  3. Nope. I learned this from the republican caucus.

    If I WANT it to be true, it is a fact.

    And I do want this to be true.

    I'd actually prefer if Carrie made it a threesome. And they had trained pet monkeys with vibrating lava lamps...

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  4. What, you beat the monkeys with the lava lamp when they do the trick wrong?

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  5. Adding insult to injury, it turns out David Bowie preemptively wrote a song about Carrie Prejean in which he claimed she had a camouflaged face and no money.

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  6. Two vibrating lava lamps go onto the bar. The barman says "Hi Fellas what's shakin'?"

    Capcha reminds us of Australian Football Legend Kevin "Sheeds" Sheehan.

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  7. herr doktor bimlerMay 22, 2009 at 2:11 AM

    When I was a boy we had to use REAL LAVA.

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  8. In my day we had to melt down the basalt ourselves!

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  9. Aye, but did ye have to burn your own sternum to do it? The youngun's these days have cans of SterNO and think it's rough.

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  10. But, but, however did you get it to VIBRATE?

    Cicadas? Mexican Jumping Beans? An assistant with cerebral palsy?

    As the former proprietor of a small, neighborhood vibrator repair shop, I ask merely out of professional curiosity...

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  11. My meager knowledge of vulcanism seems to include that lava flow is often accompanied by seismic activity. Captcha insists lava flows like mulases, which I suppose is a hybrid of three-quarters donkey and a Quarter horse.

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