I imagine the left and right wings moving up and down separately, like the wings on Asterix’s helmet, spelling out messages in semaphore — like HELP ME CAPCHA-WORD IS MAKING ME SAY THESE THINGS.
Of course, anybody who'd do that to a perfectly good mustache can have no credibility, nor should they, but he makes up for it by getting laid like twelve times a day.
Somehow, having a whole bunch of credibility just seems less, I dunno, satisfying?
You know, in the first Asterix book, Getafix brews up a potion that makes the Romans' hair grow out of control. With a little tweaking, a 21st-century Getafix could make a new potion that would allow everyone to have a perfect mustache just like Kirsanow's. That would be better than having superhuman strength.
but the 'self-loathing gay man' vibe on this one is strong.... he might be getting laid a lot if he was comfortable with his sexuality, but I'm guessing he spurns the advances from gay men, and any episodes with het women usually end up with crying on one end or the other.
Not saying I'm any good at this, yanno, but that would be where I would lay the little money I have.
I understand the need for self-appointed fraidy-cats to rail at the Moose-limbs, but there are more than enough hacks whining about entertainment (w/o dragging it through the socio-political mud Debbie occupies) that it's almost cute that she even bothers, between filing those eviction orders & taking depositions in divorce cases at her storefront in the mall.
Interesting that a semi-photogenic wingnut would seem to have a touch of the tarbrush, as opposed to the pasty, flabby, doughy, blah blah blahs who comprise so much of NRO.
I wasn't thinking of the mustache leaving the picture to follow the cursor around in the manner of a disembodied anus, merely stretching yearningly in its direction, like rolling eyes.
Because the alternative is doing something constructive, I'm trying to imagine what a "disembodied anus" might look like. A Brown Hole? (Sorry).
If it floated up to me, would I know what it was? Would I say, well, Mr. Anus, how are you? Busy, or just passing...time?
Indeed, a dialog with a disembodied anus would be uncomfortable in the extreme, but I must expose my bias against the Gastro Intestinal Tract and admit that it would be much worse to be walking down a busy street with my good friend, the disembodied anus...
I am an outsider to the American Poltical Circus, I know. But has the roost not been ruled by a disembodied anus for the last 8 years? I felt that the presence of the end products of digestion, in such profusion, might point in that diarrhea or even direction.
Amazing what someone can do with Photoshop these days...
ReplyDeleteRollie Fingers got a bonus from the A's owner when he first grew out his handlebar mustache. What's this guy's excuse?
ReplyDeleteIt's a migratory butterfly resting on it's trip North
ReplyDeleteDudley Do-Right is looking for you.
ReplyDeleteI imagine the left and right wings moving up and down separately, like the wings on Asterix’s helmet, spelling out messages in semaphore — like HELP ME CAPCHA-WORD IS MAKING ME SAY THESE THINGS.
ReplyDelete(plagiarised from S,N!).
Dood is a STUD.
ReplyDeleteI'm hopelessly straight and I think he's HOT!
Of course, anybody who'd do that to a perfectly good mustache can have no credibility, nor should they, but he makes up for it by getting laid like twelve times a day.
Somehow, having a whole bunch of credibility just seems less, I dunno, satisfying?
I'd make it with the 'stache, but only if it loses the bald dude.
ReplyDeleteYou know, in the first Asterix book, Getafix brews up a potion that makes the Romans' hair grow out of control. With a little tweaking, a 21st-century Getafix could make a new potion that would allow everyone to have a perfect mustache just like Kirsanow's. That would be better than having superhuman strength.
ReplyDeleteI dunno, mikey, you might be right..
ReplyDeletebut the 'self-loathing gay man' vibe on this one is strong.... he might be getting laid a lot if he was comfortable with his sexuality, but I'm guessing he spurns the advances from gay men, and any episodes with het women usually end up with crying on one end or the other.
Not saying I'm any good at this, yanno, but that would be where I would lay the little money I have.
As if to support my thesis, capcha says "Kadande"
Is there anyone w/ a mustache these days who isn't a closet case?
ReplyDeletePossible exception made for aging wretches of the '60s.
John Bolton's, for example, looks like it could dust a couple of dicks at once, but the gaydar doesn't go off w/ him.
And Debbie S., the self-appointed Kultur Kritik.
ReplyDeleteI understand the need for self-appointed fraidy-cats to rail at the Moose-limbs, but there are more than enough hacks whining about entertainment (w/o dragging it through the socio-political mud Debbie occupies) that it's almost cute that she even bothers, between filing those eviction orders & taking depositions in divorce cases at her storefront in the mall.
On further examination:
ReplyDeleteInteresting that a semi-photogenic wingnut would seem to have a touch of the tarbrush, as opposed to the pasty, flabby, doughy, blah blah blahs who comprise so much of NRO.
And he's got that male model stare.
He needs spandex and a cape, possibly a biomechanical tail.
ReplyDeleteDude looks like Dave Chappelle doing Black Gallagher.
ReplyDeleteStill thinking. Maybe a top hat falls down on his head and a hand emerges to twiddle the 'stache.
ReplyDeleteIf anybody deserves a biomechanical tail, it would be ME, dammit.
ReplyDeleteHe can have the cape, though.
And c'mon, if the best you can think of is to have the hand come out and twiddle his MOUSTACHE, you need to think it all the way through...
mikey
Can the moustachios follow the cursor around the page? Or inflate to twice their size whenever the cursor rolls over the picture?
ReplyDeleteCursor-following moustache is actually fairly easy, but previous fiddlings have resulted in breakage of the dragging script.
ReplyDeleteAnd c'mon, if the best you can think of is to have the hand come out and twiddle his MOUSTACHE,
It's the delivery. But yes, you're right, he could certainly twiddle his sandwich.
Well, that makes much more sense, from an empirical standpoint.
ReplyDeleteIt has been my experience that I can go no longer than six hours without twiddling my sammich.
And I'M noted for my discipline...
mikey
I wasn't thinking of the mustache leaving the picture to follow the cursor around in the manner of a disembodied anus, merely stretching yearningly in its direction, like rolling eyes.
ReplyDeleteAlso, monocle.
ReplyDeleteAny and all of these things would restore my faith in mankind and cause me to weep tears of joy.
ReplyDeleteBecause the alternative is doing something constructive, I'm trying to imagine what a "disembodied anus" might look like. A Brown Hole? (Sorry).
ReplyDeleteIf it floated up to me, would I know what it was? Would I say, well, Mr. Anus, how are you? Busy, or just passing...time?
Indeed, a dialog with a disembodied anus would be uncomfortable in the extreme, but I must expose my bias against the Gastro Intestinal Tract and admit that it would be much worse to be walking down a busy street with my good friend, the disembodied anus...
mikey
Because the alternative is doing something constructive, I'm trying to imagine what a "disembodied anus" might look like.
ReplyDeleteThe traditional answer is, I think, "a hole in the ground".
I am an outsider to the American Poltical Circus, I know. But has the roost not been ruled by a disembodied anus for the last 8 years? I felt that the presence of the end products of digestion, in such profusion, might point in that diarrhea or even direction.
ReplyDeleteEver see a lit match at the press conferences?
ReplyDeleteBy this same calculus, that fact that Obama is a smoker makes me feel good.
Enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus.
ReplyDeleteAll part of our Total Internet-Traditions Awareness project.
Teh Internet as disembodied anus?
ReplyDeleteI'm getting on my rocket ship to Uranus now.
ReplyDeleteI'm calling her the coaderiz...
mikey
I'm getting on my rocket ship to Uranus now.
ReplyDeleteBummer.