Monday, July 27, 2009

Swinging on a Star

A Mr. Jeremy D. Boreing - I have a stupid name too! - sees fit to reprint his initial essay on Sarah Palin after her selection as wannabe VP:
The only name in the media today, for better or for worse, is Sarah Palin. For better because she has single-handedly solved John McCain’s two biggest problems, his base, and his base.
Well-said my friend! He adds an update:
In the end, I suspect that the Sarah they have most to fear is not Vice President Sarah or even Governor Sarah at all. It is Citizen Sarah’s first day on the clock, and her star seems as bright to me as ever it did last September.
Any stars seen were likely headlights.



ALSO:

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16 comments:

  1. Another KiwiJuly 27, 2009 at 2:14 PM

    Emo Boreing haz sadz. Hiz star iz gorn. Butt she will be bak and briter than evah!~


    Heard about them new halimpeo peppers!taste like ham, smell like ham but boy! they ain't ham

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dragon-King WangchuckJuly 27, 2009 at 3:00 PM

    In my own defense, mi spelenigs R mooch bettar when I'm not thinking about Jennifer Granholm. Rawr.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Substance McGravitasJuly 27, 2009 at 3:16 PM

    Yeesh that screenshot's ugly. But I love those.

    ReplyDelete
  4. mikeyJuly 27, 2009 at 3:18 PM

    Maybe you should have added some gratuitous dancing grannies, wingstr...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Substance McGravitasJuly 27, 2009 at 3:20 PM

    I'm trying to figure out some new granny-related mischief, but it's hot hot hot.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Erick EricksonJuly 27, 2009 at 4:00 PM

    I searched the internet for "hot granny-related mischief" and ended up here.

    What is this crap? No pictures of Sarah Palin in a bikini or anything.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Substance McGravitasJuly 27, 2009 at 4:04 PM

    [Light bulb turns on]

    ReplyDelete
  8. zombie rotten mcdonaldJuly 27, 2009 at 4:12 PM

    uh-oh.

    I fear the House will soon have more Substance.

    Horrible, horrible Substance.

    Honey! Pick up some more brain bleach!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. tigrisJuly 27, 2009 at 4:31 PM

    Honey! Pick up some more brain bleach!!

    Rinse well before eating.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Another KiwiJuly 27, 2009 at 5:07 PM

    Hot Granny related mischief is my new motto

    ReplyDelete
  11. mikeyJuly 27, 2009 at 5:19 PM

    We have sound intel that the Granny-Related Program Activities are located in the House of Substance, and to the north, east, south and west.

    We don't want the smoking doob to be grannies in fishnets...

    We DO want geysi

    ReplyDelete
  12. Substance McGravitasJuly 27, 2009 at 6:21 PM

    You know, I predict that the ol' dwelling is going to be so blazing hot that I will do fuck-all with silly computing games tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  13. mikeyJuly 27, 2009 at 6:56 PM

    As a veteran of too-hot-to-fuckall, let me just offer three suggestions.

    1. Tequila

    2. Cold water

    4. Spritzer bottle.

    If you think that 2 and 3 are redundant, you're wrong. They overlap, but in the venn diagram of itstoofuckinghot, they each serve their own need...

    Don't get pructry

    ReplyDelete
  14. zombie rotten mcdonaldJuly 27, 2009 at 8:03 PM

    my instructions are missing a page, mikey.

    but if step three is squeezins from a bat's adrenal gland, I'm covered....

    ReplyDelete
  15. mikeyJuly 27, 2009 at 8:23 PM

    7. Wear women's underwear

    I hope I've cleared up any ambiguity...

    ReplyDelete
  16. M. BouffantJuly 27, 2009 at 10:16 PM

    Take a cold shower while wearing a slip. Then just keep the slip on 'till it dries/heats up.

    Repeat.

    ReplyDelete

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