Just happened to climb onto a third-floor window-ledge. Yeah, right. This is how liberalism has ruined Thailand. A burglar is caught in the act, but because he's disguised as an 8-year-old boy, the police just dress up as Spiderman. The justice system is mollycoddling criminals.
Considering how long it's been since anyone coddled my mollies, I have a right to feel envious.
Those are expensive! You have to extract them while the goats are alert so that you can get the veins to faint into your soufflé at just the right moment.
not being inventive enough to, say, throw a big bird into a hydraulic press? This is EXACTLY WHY I am not allowed to play with nice things. When I say "nice things", I mean blenders.
I saw "chicken juice" on a label once and have been intrigued by the thought of animal juices ever since. Would you have to get a special juicer? Would you have to peel them first, or would the juicer separate the rind and pulp out automatically? When animal juicers become common, will gatorade change their recipe to no longer be guilty of false labeling?
Sadly, it was a can of "Sweet Sue" chicken broth. I bet back when Castleberry's corporate headquarters was still in Georgia it read "yardbird squeezins'".
It is a common misconception that Cheetos are made from Cheetahs. The animal juice component is actually from Chimpanzees and the very first donor was Cheetah from the Tarzan films. Due to economic and quality issues, supplies have recently been sourced from Tobacco industry sources and this has allowed new flavours to introduced.
The animal juice component is actually from Chimpanzees and the very first donor was Cheetah from the Tarzan films. Due to economic and quality issues, supplies have recently been sourced from Tobacco industry sources and this has allowed new flavours to introduced.
This is completely implausible as due to the internet Tarzan films are plentiful.
Aha I see that RB has accepted the very popular conservative theory that says that all things on the internet are real. Sadly many internet videos are not filmed "live" and thus the people and, yes, animals that appear in them, may not actually be in those actual places at that time. Some of the animals may actually be dead, their juices unavailable to the snack food industry. Because of the well known Hollywood liberal avoidance of the truth it has meant that there is a shortfall in Chimpanzee juices for snack food production and other sources have had to be investigated. Luckily our friends in the cruelly misrepresented Cigarette industry have allowed ingress of animal juices that would otherwise be wasted in Toxic Chemical dumping areas.
You mean this didn't happen in Italy?
ReplyDeleteThis blog is all about the happy ending.
ReplyDeleteWhat?
That costs extra.
ReplyDeleteJust happened to climb onto a third-floor window-ledge. Yeah, right.
ReplyDeleteThis is how liberalism has ruined Thailand. A burglar is caught in the act, but because he's disguised as an 8-year-old boy, the police just dress up as Spiderman. The justice system is mollycoddling criminals.
Considering how long it's been since anyone coddled my mollies, I have a right to feel envious.
If the fishy smell didn't disgust me so much I'd be all for coddling.
ReplyDeleteBut just look at this handsome fella, RB!
ReplyDelete~
OMG IT'S HOVERING!
ReplyDeleteWhat is that thing?
I never realised that fish could display lordosis.
ReplyDeleteCome now, RB.
ReplyDeleteYou're going to tell me you never had Black Sailfin Mollies as guests in your vivarium?
Don't tell me you're another of them zebrafish nihilists...
~
Aw, fishy is even giving you the pouty look.
ReplyDeleteI am a-scared to click on any link from ITTDGY in case it's another extreme close-up of an emu.
ReplyDeleteWhat I'd really like to see is the view from inside an emu.
ReplyDeleteDude, Science has been working on Emulation for many moons.
ReplyDeleteIs there going to be more large flightless bird mockery? Fowl play indeed
ReplyDeleteYour capcha sex shop recommends sachfur. You know you want it.
Moa puns!
ReplyDeleteEmu oil massages.
ReplyDeleteEmu oil is one of the basic food groups that our culture has chosen to deny.
ReplyDeleteI'd prefer emu oil-massages to emu-oil massages. I bet they have to squeeze them pretty hard to get enough emu juice to skim for oil.
ReplyDeleteAll our cell walls are made of fat
ReplyDeleteTheoretically the Bacon Explosion could be brought to life.
I bet they have to squeeze them pretty hard
ReplyDeleteI think you boil the oil out of them, like Baby Oil.
I still think the "basic food group" idea is the charmer.
ReplyDeleteWhat other basic food groups have we been missing by not being inventive enough to, say, throw a big bird into a hydraulic press?
Food groups:
Eagle cracklins
Aged gecko tails
Limpet scrapings
Otter noses
ReplyDeleteMoose bile
Fainting goat veins
Fainting goat veins
ReplyDeleteThose are expensive! You have to extract them while the goats are alert so that you can get the veins to faint into your soufflé at just the right moment.
not being inventive enough to, say, throw a big bird into a hydraulic press?
ReplyDeleteThis is EXACTLY WHY I am not allowed to play with nice things. When I say "nice things", I mean blenders.
I saw "chicken juice" on a label once and have been intrigued by the thought of animal juices ever since. Would you have to get a special juicer? Would you have to peel them first, or would the juicer separate the rind and pulp out automatically? When animal juicers become common, will gatorade change their recipe to no longer be guilty of false labeling?
ReplyDeleteCaptcha is whomank. Who indeed.
I saw "chicken juice" on a label once
ReplyDeletePlease tell me it was some Cheeto product.
Sadly, it was a can of "Sweet Sue" chicken broth. I bet back when Castleberry's corporate headquarters was still in Georgia it read "yardbird squeezins'".
ReplyDeleteI did say please.*
ReplyDelete*Whining may contain traces of nuts.
So what is the minimum amount of cheetah juice required for Cheetohs to satisfy the consumer-protection laws?
ReplyDeleteI think the rules for inclusion of hydrogenated cheetah are somewhat lax.
ReplyDeleteIt burns me up to think of those cheetahs slowly inflating...
It burns me up to think of those cheetahs slowly inflating...
ReplyDeleteI say this with great caution, RB, but trust me on this one—you don't want to go there.
It is a common misconception that Cheetos are made from Cheetahs. The animal juice component is actually from Chimpanzees and the very first donor was Cheetah from the Tarzan films. Due to economic and quality issues, supplies have recently been sourced from Tobacco industry sources and this has allowed new flavours to introduced.
ReplyDeleteThe animal juice component is actually from Chimpanzees and the very first donor was Cheetah from the Tarzan films. Due to economic and quality issues, supplies have recently been sourced from Tobacco industry sources and this has allowed new flavours to introduced.
ReplyDeleteThis is completely implausible as due to the internet Tarzan films are plentiful.
Aha I see that RB has accepted the very popular conservative theory that says that all things on the internet are real. Sadly many internet videos are not filmed "live" and thus the people and, yes, animals that appear in them, may not actually be in those actual places at that time. Some of the animals may actually be dead, their juices unavailable to the snack food industry.
ReplyDeleteBecause of the well known Hollywood liberal avoidance of the truth it has meant that there is a shortfall in Chimpanzee juices for snack food production and other sources have had to be investigated. Luckily our friends in the cruelly misrepresented Cigarette industry have allowed ingress of animal juices that would otherwise be wasted in Toxic Chemical dumping areas.