I never thought this would happen to me, but while on wildlife research studies in Arizona behind a bingo hall I came across a dead granny. After I cleaned up and retreated behind the dumpster I was witness to an event that should shake the foundations of granthropology:
Yes, I had discovered the first documented case of GRANNIBALISM.
Yours from the pre-trial centre,
S. McGravitas
well, at least you're not wasting your transit time.
ReplyDeleteThe tragedy of GrannAss Munchen's syndrome.
ReplyDeleteIt can never be cured.
~
Jan Brewer has already called a press conference to announce the new scourge of illegal mexigrant grannies committing unspeakable atrocities in the desert. Those beheadings were nothing, I tellya, NOTHING!!!
ReplyDeleteGrannies munching Butt.
ReplyDeleteI suppose you think "grannibalism" is funny, sir.
ReplyDeleteYou know, once you start animating people biting asses the art just flows.
ReplyDeleteWV: elites! Which is me.
Maybe you can get a grant to study granthopophagy.
ReplyDeleteYou should contact a bacteriologist as that is clearly a Gram stain.
ReplyDeleteLet me examine it with this handy Crone-O-Meter. Wait, let me wipe it clean.
ReplyDeleteCan you buy them with food-stamps?
ReplyDeleteMarvin Harris says grannies eat grannies due to a protein deficiency, that's all. Just like the Aztecs. Give them protein shakes and their behavior will eventually change.
ReplyDeleteThe granny that came along was awfully small. Perhaps it was a young granny.
ReplyDeleteShe's probably just suffering from a particular kind of mal de caribou we call "Granny Starvation" around these parts...
ReplyDeleteGranny as carrion-eater isn't a problem I guess...it's predation you have to be alert to.
ReplyDeletethat is clearly a Gram stain.
ReplyDeleteIf you go around killing dragons, of course your sword is going to get dirty.
It was forged by Wayland the Smith and originally belonged to his father, Sigmund, who received it in the hall of the Volsung after pulling it out of the tree Barnstokk into which Odin had stuck it—no-one else could pull it out. The sword was destroyed and reforged at least once. After it was reforged, it could cleave an anvil in twain.
ReplyDeleteFreakin Viking Wingnuts, sitting around sucking down Mead and Ale and telling increasingly outrageous stories about their weapons. Today it's a six inch Titanium-Plutonium Alloy .357 that weighs 9 ounces unloaded and can easily handle a steady diet of the hottest loads you can build. It nestles in one custom hand-tooled spanish leather boot. In the other is a 12 inch Beryllium switchblade. You can throw it through an engine block.
No, dood, you totally CAN!!!