Monday, November 16, 2009

Water for Elephants

A book by Sara Gruen. Seven pages in and it seems like complete shit: the writing is TERRIBLE. It's grating to fear the arrival of the next cliché. Many of the one-star reviews at Google assure me that there's lotsa filth in it, which is reason to keep going, but I can't do it my friends.
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13 comments:

  1. JenniferNovember 16, 2009 at 10:25 AM

    I liked the story, even if the writing wasn't the best, but maybe that was because I wasn't expecting the best and was using it to fill time...

    Of course I may have liked it better because I read it while the Youngest Lamblet was taking swimming lessons and was overwhelmed by the view of tanned lats and pecs... tanned lats and pecs make everything seem better.

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  2. mikeyNovember 16, 2009 at 10:39 AM

    Maybe the filth is Elephant dung. That at least wouldn't be clichéd.

    Hopefully it's not 'Elephant Water', 'cause I've heard that is some NASTY stuff...

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  3. JenniferNovember 16, 2009 at 10:45 AM

    I think Mikey might be correct... I'm not remembering a lot of other filth. Some, but not a lot...

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  4. Substance McGravitasNovember 16, 2009 at 11:09 AM

    Page one - PAGE ONE MIND YOU - mentioned "ample charms". A search reveals, thankfully, only one pending "bosom", carefully described using the approved adjective-adjective-noun format.

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  5. Substance McGravitasNovember 16, 2009 at 11:28 AM

    Note also that I am complaining about shit writing after yet another comic-book post. WHAT IS MY PROBLEM?

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  6. JenniferNovember 16, 2009 at 12:14 PM

    Pending bosom is better than a pendulous bosom...

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  7. Hamish MackNovember 16, 2009 at 12:37 PM

    There's a great deal of penduloscity about teh elephants, in my albeit limited experience

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  8. fishNovember 16, 2009 at 1:34 PM

    I prefer water for chocolate. It tastes better than elephants.

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  9. Hamish MackNovember 16, 2009 at 1:49 PM

    Plus easier to store and less trouble to explain to the neighbours.

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  10. herr doktor bimlerNovember 16, 2009 at 2:16 PM

    AK forgets that the whole advantage of keeping an elephant in the corner of the room is that no-one talks about it.

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  11. fishNovember 16, 2009 at 3:05 PM

    Dear herr doktor bimler:

    The Nine Hundred Pound Gorilla Union (NHPGU) would like a word with you about certain scab elephants in your employ.

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  12. M. BouffantNovember 16, 2009 at 4:34 PM

    Pending bosom.

    May be a veiled reference to something best left veiled.

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  13. herr doktor bimlerNovember 16, 2009 at 5:16 PM

    Q.: Where does a 900-lb gorilla sleep?
    A.: In a picket line around the House of Substance.

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