FAIL
"I said, 'Good morning, welcome to the Crystal Cathedral.' " She asked the man, "Where are you from?" He replied, "Oh, from around here." He handed Spicer a folded note written in Magic marker. Tucked into the middle of the note was his driver's license and what appeared to be a business card. As he was walking down the aisle, she began reading the note, which referred to a truck in the parking lot and a gun.
"The next minute, there was a pop," Spicer said. "I thought he was praying. I didn't realize he had shot himself."
Yvette Manson, a volunteer usher, said she was talking to the tourists when she heard a shot that she likened to a firecracker. "I had just been telling them about the suicide prevention ministry we have."
How does praying sound like a pop?
ReplyDeleteIt's the "just got borned" noise, a direct result of eating up a kernel of knowledge.
ReplyDeleteHow does praying sound like a pop?
ReplyDeleteSOMEzombie's never been around kneeling old folks, has he?
I resemble that remark, tigris.
ReplyDeleteplus: the verification word is 'braine'
Blogger is getting squirrely.
How does praying sound like a poop?
ReplyDeleteWell what does praying sound like? Around here it makes a vulgar farty noise, on account of all the whoopee cushions placed in strategic places by godless heathens.
Captcha word = "fectum". No way am I going to look that up.
"IT fifth grade", RB?
ReplyDeleteYou DO KNOW I am a grammar and spelling zombie, don't you?
"fectum? damn near married 'em!"
ReplyDeleteWhat comment where? I DO NOT SEE ONE.
ReplyDeleteIn any case, I had a friend in fifth grade whose knees crackled like a fire when he did exercises. It was fun.
IT IS A MYSTERY!!!
ReplyDeleteProbably involves time travel or something.
ReplyDeleteWe wioll have been havening our eye on you.
ReplyDeletePlease let me know where I am going to lose my keys.
ReplyDeleteIf it was the key of E, it belonged to the people anyway.
ReplyDeleteWoke up this mornin'
ReplyDeleteYes I woke up this mornin'
And my keys have done gone away
Keys done gone and left me,
Except if this is yesterday and my keys are lost in the damn future, anyway
When the moon disappears forever
ReplyDeleteAnd the sun shines electric blue
And the mountains and trees tumble into the sea
To rest there for eternity
No matter what you do
I will still blame you
Probable-Possible, my black hen,
ReplyDeleteStole my keys in the Relative When.
She can't bring them back to the Positive Now
Because she's unable to postulate how.
There once was a lady named Bright
ReplyDeleteWho travelled much faster than light
She set out one day
In a relative way
And was eaten by Morlocks.
Quite oft upon my couch I lie,
ReplyDeleteGiving vacant and or pensive sighs.
Because my keys have gone from eye.
An email comes from late next week
Typed by a hen, using her beak
The keys are inside a Jurassic beast
Last seen in Montana, kind of east.